Joanne
(Talking)
Mark?
Mark
Hi
Joanne
I told her not to call you
Mark
That's Maureen
But can I help since I'm here?
Joanne
I hired and engineer...
Mark
Great!
Well, nice to have met you
Joanne
Wait!
She's three hours late
(Singing)
The samples won't delay
But the cable -
Mark
There's another way
Say something - Anything
Joanne
Test - One, two, three...
Mark
Anything but that
Joanne
This is weird...
Mark
It's weird
Joanne
Very weird -
Mark
f**in' weird
Joanne
I'm so mad
That I don't know what to do
Fighting with microphones
Freezing down to my bones
And to top it all off
I'm with you
Mark
Feel like going insane?
Got a fire in your brain?
And you're thinking of drinking gasoline?
Joanne
As a matter of fact -
Mark
Honey, I know this act
It's called, the 'Tango Maureen'
The Tango Maureen...
It's a dark, dizzy
Merry-go-round
As she keeps you dangling -
Joanne
You're wrong
Mark
Your heart she is mangling -
Joanne
It's different with me -
Mark
And you toss and you turn
'Cause her cold eyes can burn
Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound
Joanne
I think I know what you mean...
Both
The Tango Maureen
Mark
Has she ever
Pouted her lips
And called you 'Pookie'?
Joanne
Never
Mark
Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?
Joanne
This is... Spooky
Did you swoon
When she walked through the door?
Mark
Every time - so be... Cautious
Joanne
Did she moon over other boys--?
Mark
More than moon -
Joanne
I'm getting... Nauseous
Mark
(Talking)
Where'd you learn to tango?
Joanne
With the French Amba**ador's daughter in her dorm room at Miss Porter's
And you?
Mark
With Nanette Himmelfarb
The Rabbi's daughter at the Scarsdale Jewish Community Center
It's hard to do this backwards
Joanne
You should try it
In heels!
(Singing)
She cheated!
Mark
She cheated
Joanne
Maureen cheated
Mark
f**in' cheated!
Joanne
I'm defeated
I should give up right now
Mark
Gotta look on the bright side
With all of your might
Joanne
I'd fall for her still anyhow
Both
When you're dancing her dance
You don't stand a chance
Her grip of romance
Makes you fall!
Mark
So you think, 'might as well' -
Joanne
'Dance the Tango to Hell'!
Both
'At least I'll have Tangoed at all'
The tango Maureen...
Gotta dance til your diva is through
You pretend to believe her...
'Cause in the end - you can't leave her
But the end it will come
Still you have to play dumb
Til you're glum and you bum
And turn blue
Mark
Why do we love when she's mean?
Joanne
And she can be so obscene...
Mark
(Talking)
Try the mike
Joanne
(Singing)
My Maureen (een, een, een...)
Mark
(Talking)
Patched
Joanne
Thanks
Mark
You know - I feel great now!
Joanne
I feel lousy
(Answers phone)
Honey, we're... Pookie!
You never call me Pookie...
Forget it, we're patched
Both
(Singing)
The Tango: Maureen!