[Verse 1]
Sitting on a truffet, puffing on the best cut buds
Trying to get bu*t from Miss Muffet
Me and Teddy Ruxpin sturring up a ruckus
Egging all the houses, smashing all the pumpkins
s** a Dick Butkus, chumps can't funk with the punk kids
Ash Roth be the king of the blumpkins
Any Tim Duncan, spur of the moment
Let the whole world know I run sh**, jump ship quick
Tell a friend that I'm dumb sick
Spit fungus that'll grow from a dung trip
Twist to a front flip, son that was some trick
Watch all the dumb chicks hump when I bump this
[Verse 2]
Kinda like the blonde Bob Saget, Ash can get nasty
Pa** me a blunt and some Captain
Chilling with an Ashley, heading to the mall
Sitting in the backseat, getting jerked off
Ten feet tall with the balls of a matador
Door-matted who*e with your words, heard that before
Poor metaphor, pedicure, get your feet fixed
Walk in my shoes for a few, you gonna need it
Yeah, get your Wii Fit to practice your frees with
Need a few weeks before you can compete with
Razor Ramon flow, oh so sharp
You can take Kapowski, I'mma take Lark on my go-kart
[Verse 3]
Mario Kart sk**s are outrageous
Play me anyday and I'll be the best racist
Wait, no, erase it, meant to say racer
Traded in my cell phone for a new pager
Take off your Bluetooth now dot com
I'm at the grocery store with hot moms
About thirty five with at least two kids
We can make-out while my friend baby sits
All up in your fridge eating left-over sh**
Tuna sandwich, bu*terscotch Krimpets
Cheetos be my choice of chips
I enjoy for a bit, take a sip from my Ssips and split
Roll that J up, is it rolled?
Yeah, roll it up, uhh
[Verse 4]
Hair like a troll doll, basketball shorts on
Yeah, I'm a dork but I'm still holding court
Ball up, baller, y'all take too long to get dolled up
Give a f** if I look like I just woke up
Who am I trying to impress? Honey in the sun dress
With the breasts luscious just sent me a text
O-M-G, you're the B-E-est
If you're trying to have s**, I'm the best at it