Deep through the mists of time
Gaze to the crystal ball
Back to the age of darkness
Black was the protocol
A King ruled the web with fear
Spilling the blood of men
Then from the ocean came
Puff the Barbarian
Born in a tiny bowl Puff was a pet
Sold into slav-er-y by the man
Eating the weeds till he was strong enough
Breaking his bonds like nobody can
Down the sewer pipes of Hell
A thousand kitties then did bleed
Constraints were slain as well
Hacked his way out to the C
And there he found
His destiny
Hammer of the Ocean God
"Xor taking care of me"
Then in a dream Xor requested he
"Go to the Sun King, get what I yearn
Kernighan saw it, prophet of the C
Knowledge - so they may never return"
At the tower Puff appealed
For the wisdom of the One
Denied, his mind did reel
Puff was getting tired of Sun
Broke down the guard
Cause math is hard
Saw McNealy on his throne
All alone and only bones
Come the Sun King blade ablur
Hammer down eclipse the Sun
And Puff, the land secured
The new King Barbarian