It was back in thirty-two, when times were hard He had a Colt forty-five and a deck of cards Stagger Lee He wore rat-drawn shoes and an old Stetson hat Had a twenty-eight Ford, he had payments on that Stagger Lee His woman threw him out in the ice and the snow And she told him, "Never ever come back no more" Stagger Lee So he walked through the rain, and he walked through the mud Till he came to a place called 'The Bucket of Blood' Stagger Lee He said, "Mister Motherf**er, you know who I am?" And the barkeep said, "No, and I don't give a good god-damn!" To Stagger Lee He said, "Well bartender, it's-a plain to see I'm the bad motherf**er called Stagger Lee Mister Stagger Lee!" Well, the barkeeper said, "Yeah, I've heard your name down the way And I kick motherf**ing a**es like you every day Mister Stagger Lee" Well, those were the last words that the barkeep said 'Cause Stag put four holes in his motherf**ing head Just then in came a broad called Nellie Brown Known to make more money than any b**h in town Yeah She struts across the bar, hitching up her skirt
Over to Stagger Lee, she's starting to flirt Oh, Stagger Lee... She saw the barkeep, said, "Oh God, he can't be dead!" Stag said, "Well, just count the holes in the motherf**er's head" She said, "You ain't look like you scored in quite a time Why not come to my pad? It won't cost you a dime Mister Stagger Lee" "But there's something that I have to say before you begin You have to be gone before my man Billy Dilly comes in Mister Stagger Lee" "I'll stay here till Billy Dilly comes in, till time comes to pa** And furthermore I'll f** Billy Dilly in his motherf**ing a**" Said Stagger Lee "I'm a bad motherf**er, don't you know And I'll crawl over fifty good pussies just to get to one fat boy's a**hole" Said Stagger Lee Just then Billy Dilly rolls in He says, "You must be the mad motherf**er called Stagger Lee" "I'm Stagger Lee!" "Yeah, I'm Stagger Lee and you better get down on your knees And s** my dick, because if you don't you're gonna be dead" Said Stagger Lee Well, Billy Dilly dropped down and slobbered on his head And Stag filled him full of lead Oh yeah!