[Verse]
No time was better than my freshman year at college
Everything was solid up in UNC Charlotte
The parties were bangin', alcohol kept me faded
But let me tell you the tale of this girl I once dated
Little cute chick, she was shy yet bubbly
Three weeks into dating and she told me that she loved me
I was like: "Uh... I love you too?"
But honestly, I was too young to know what love was, dude
She loved the fact that I was a rapper, actually
One night in her dorm, we was making out on the couch and she
Pulled away really fat and grabbed my face and said "rap to me"
I was shocked but she was serious, I had to speak
I started spitting some quick bars from a song I knew
Lil' Cease and Lil' Kim's song "Crush on You"
I was like: "CDs with crazy ba**, keep my lady laced
Don't be fooled by the baby face"
She let out a squeal and grabbed me by my shirt
"Oh my God, I love that song", she started rapping Kim's verse
"Aiyyo shorty, won't you go get a bag of the lethal
I'll be undressed in the bra, all see-through"
I just sat there and watched as she danced around
She sang the whole damn song as she pranced around
She said: "Hold on, I gotta show you something"
She ran to back, I was like "this chick is buggin'"
10 minutes later, she walked into the front room
She came out wearing something like a Lil' Kim costume
Blue wig, blue lips, long feather boa
She needed a mic, so she grabbed a bottle of Head and Shoulders
She danced to Lil' Kim's album all night, yo
It was 5% s**y, 95% psycho
I let her dance and pretended I wasn't creeped out
Later she fell asleep, that's when I got my chance to sneak out
Shot her a text to say I needed to go and study
I'll catch up with you later this week, see ya buddy
Now that's not the end of the story, nah, I ain't done yet
I was 18 and I just got my refund check
One thing you oughtta know about me is
When I was young, I was at the strip clubs like every other weekend
We grab a table, started pulling out our dollars
Ladies all around, we started acting like some ballers
The DJ said: "Alright! Attention to the stage
Put ya hands together for Ms. Petite Rage!"
I turned around and whispered "hol' up" and I froze up
My roomate started laughing then he punched me in the shoulder
Petite Rage was the girl that I was dating
Now she's on the stage, shakin' booty for Satan
Those were the same moves she did in the apartment
But now she's wearing hot pink Lil' Kim garments
My boys laughing so hard, they spilled my sweet tea
I ducked behind the waitress so the chick wouldn't see me
We left the venue, dudes sitll makin' fun of me
I was dating a stripper and a Lil' Kim wannabe