Chapter 33
It was a day of farewells and happiness, and but one emotion beat in the hearts of the residents of the alley, to whit that Master Radwan el-Husseini enjoyed a special place in all their hearts. Master Radwan had sought God's guidance as to whether he should undertake the duty of pilgrimage that year and God had responded positively. Everyone was aware that he would be leaving that after noon, God willing, for Suez on his way to the Holy Lands and his house had filled with lifelong friends and brethren-in-purity come to wish him Godspeed and who now sat in a circle around him in the old, humble room whose walls had so often listened to their sweet and pious evening discourse. Much was said of the pilgrimage. Memories of it, fervently recounted by tongues in all corners of the room around a wavering line of incense rising from the brazier, came back to people, who narrated fragmented reports ranging from those of their contemporaries to those of men long dead, quoting many a Noble Tradition handed down from the Prophet and much beautiful poetry. One, sweet of tongue, recited in a singsong verses of the Wise Word, after which all hearkened attentively to a spate of words through which Master Radwan's heart gave expression to the gentleness and goodness contained within it.
One of the brethren-in-purity having said to him, ':A happy jour ney and a blessed return!" Master Radwan's face broke into a beaming smile, clothing his beauty in yet greater beauty, and he said, in his tender voice, "My brother, speak not to me of return. Should any depart for God's House with longing for his homeland in his heart, God is likely to void his reward, refuse his prayers, and deplete his happiness. I shall think of the return in truth only when I depart the Cradle of Islam on my way back to Egypt-and that return shall be my return to the pilgrimage a further time, should the Merciful so allow and should He aid me therein. He has bestowed on me by His grace resources enough to allow me to live out my remaining days in the Pure Terrain, with naught before my eyes, morning and evening, but a land that once received the impress of the Prophet's feet, breezes in whose drafts the wings of angels fluttered, and habitations that hearkened to the Noble Revelation as it descended from the heavens to earth only to bear the dwellers thereon upward once more to the heavens. There naught but thoughts of eternity occupy the mind. and the heart throbs only with the love of God. There, my brother, are physic and healing. I die with longing to behold Mecca outlined against the sky, catch my first sight of the heavens above it, and lis ten to the whispering of time within its precincts; to walk among the skirts of its mountains, to closet myself within its places of worship, to quench my burning thirst at the waters of Zamzam, to set out upon the road laid down by the Prophet on that migration of his that men have followed for 1,300 years, as still they do, and so bring refreshment to my heart by visiting his tomb and praying in the Sacred Meadow. Such is my heart's yearning for these things that time cannot suffice to express it and such are the opportunities for propinquity and hap piness available to me that the mind can scarcely picture them. I behold myself, my brethren, wandering the ravines of Mecca following the miraculous verses as they were sent down for the first time, as though listening to a lesson from the Sublime Self-what happiness! I behold myself prostrating myself in the Meadow, pictur ing the face of the Beloved as though in a dream-what bliss! I behold myself kneeling before the Tomb, begging forgiveness-what tranquillity! I behold myself drinking at Zamzam, moistening the limbs of longing with the dew of intercession-what peace! Brother, remind me not of the return but pray with me to God that He make my wishes come tiue!"
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His opinion stirred up many a conflicting view, some cleaving to the text, some resorting to the commentaries, others tracing the roots of vengeance back to mercy. Many were more eloquent than he and more learned but he was not prepared to debate. He was responding simply to the need to express the love and joy that filled his heart, so he smiled with the innocence of a child, his face ruddy; his eyes sparkling, and said in a voice rendered so tender by his pa**ion that it sounded softer than a lover's whisper, "Forgive me, good gentlemen. I love life. Indeed, I love my self, not as an identity to which I cling, but as a part indistinguishable from the rest of humanity, as a pulse of life, as a creation of the Sublime Maker and an exercise of the Divine Wisdom, and I love all people, even perverted criminals. Do they not symbolize life's agonizing distress on the path to perfection? Are they not a darkness the casting of whose shadow over the effulgence of the Good serves to illuminate it? Allow me to reveal to you a deep secret-or do you perchance know what has impelled me to make the pilgrimage this year?"
Master Radwan fell silent for a while, his limpid eyes shining with
a brilliant light. Then, responding to the inquiring looks returned by the others' eyes, he said, "I do not deny that to make the pilgrimage is a wish that my heart has long urged me to fulfill. The Divine Will, however, decreed that I should postpone it year after year, until I believed that I had come to prefer the longing for the Beloved to the Beloved himself, for the longing to perform an act of worship is as pleasurable as its performance. In addition, things were in our alley as you know them to have been, and L"'le DeY:J led two men a..'""1d a young woman who are our neighbors astray. The men he led, via a pillaged grave, to jail, and the young woman he lured, via the abyss of lust, into the mire of sin. At this, my heart was brutally shaken and my breast sundered. I will not hide from you, good gentlemen, that I experienced feelings of guilt, for one of the men eked out his exis tence on crumbs and disturbed the grave only in the hope that he might find among the worm-eaten bones some tasty morsel, much as a wandering dog picks its food from the garbage heaps; how often, then, did his hunger make me think of my own well-rounded body and ruddy face, and I was abashed and overcome by tears, and I said to myself, in appalled reprimand, 'What did you do' (for God has given me much good fortune) 'to prevent this calamity or alleviate its impact?' Had I not allowed the Devil to toy with my neighbors while I, in my joy and complacency, was distracted from his doings? Does not the good man become, through his inaction, the Devil's unwitting a**istant? My tormented conscience implored me to obey the ancient call and to depart, seeking forgiveness, for the Land of Repentance, so that, should God will that I return, I might do so with a pure heart and place that, my tongue, and my hands at the service of the Good in God's wide kingdom."
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Master Radwan left the cafe surrounded by his friends, having first been joined by two relatives who had decided to go with him as far as Suez. Looking in at the warehouse, he found Master Salim Elwan pouring over his ledgers, and he smiled and said to him, "I am about to leave, so let me embrace you."
The other lifted his head, astonished. He had known when Master Radwan was to leave but had not bestirred himself to do any thing about it. Master Radwan, however, was unconcerned by this omission, knowing as well as any the state the man was in. He refused therefore to leave the neighborhood without first bidding him farewell. The other, as though becoming aware only at that moment of his oversight, was overcome with embarra**ment. Master Radwan, however, enfolded him in his arms, kissed him, and invoked God's blessings upon him at length, staying with him a while. Then he said, rising, "Let us pray God that we may make the pilgrimage together next year."
"God willing," murmured Master Salim, insincerely.
They embraced again, Master Radwan returned to his friends, and all proceeded to the beginning of the alley, where a carriage, loaded with his luggage, awaited him. The man shook hands warmly with those who had come to see him off and got in along with his two relatives, and the carriage set off, followed by all their eyes, down the hill toward Ghouriya Street, turning from there onto Azhar Street.