Arnie works the cyclone at the state fair Says he's in it for the chicks Smokes about two packs of cigarettes each day And he drinks just like a fish Arnie never talks of family And he never found a wife He sleeps with the bearded lady So does the guy that swallows knives Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him-I swear
Arnie talks as if someday he'll leave If the right thing comes along A distant dream as a mercenary marine Is a dream that's long gone My eyes, my eyes they're not like his Maybe a little God, I wish my eyes were just like his Arnie's on the road eight months each year Winters down south where it's warm He's in a trailer park in Sarasota Getting drunk with the clowns