I say chum-rades
I was on my way to the club the other day when this chappie stops me and says
"I don't quite like the cut of your jib, sir" or something along those lines though rather in the modern parlace I'm afraid
So I relayed to him in no uncertain terms that the cut of my job was entirely beyond reproach
And so I went on to explain What Goes On
The Noel Coward of Rap, I'm not blithering
The world of Chap is what I'm living in
Spelt backwards means nothing at all
Stop fiddle faddling and come to the ball
Check the facts and expose those prats
They're tiresome brats, they're not chaps
The Government is posh, but they're not dandy
I've no cosh but I've a pipe and i shall keep it handy
With great grooming comes great responsibility
To get in your clothing like a j**eler does filigree
Tweed and silk over a loupe by Mister B
Lets get a million views of chap-hop history
Careful stitches
Like a legspinner's pitches
Lined in silk if the pure wool itches
Here's a rule of thumb from the chap hop didact
It's not where you're from it's wear your hat
Smart just like a chap (repeated)
You see ladies and gentlemen
This is what one has to do
Almost every day
Explain to people, just like that
The rapping dandy twenty years later
Still going strong having spurned the haters
New generations dressing their best
Chap-hop on two gramophone decks
It's jolly fun so how could you hate it
Write some rhymes while my tailor waited
Twentieth century but how do you date it
Celebrated but still understated
Like Teddy Thomas on a balcony milady
Keep living life like it's the eighteen eighties
A chap out of time but rising to the top
Music hall MC will just not stop
The tweed revolution, cultural exchange
Pay attention don't look all strange
Hail the chap give three piece a chance
Face the world with a dandy stance
Smart just like a chap (repeated)
That is correct i am chappy number one in Cheam
Chappy number one in Guildford
Chappy number one in Richmond upon Thames
Chappy number one in Compton
That's Compton village near Godalming you see
Chappy number one in Hove
Mr.B and I'm out