Do you have some problems Would you like someone to solve them Would you like someone to share in your misery Well I don't know the answer But I know a flamenco dancer Who will dance for you if you will dance for me Her name's Miranda She's a Rudolph Valentino fan And she doesn't claim to understand She bakes brownies for the boys in the band And every Sunday morning When the sermon lines are forming And Saturday night is a memory that I gave She's busy in the pantry Far away from Elmer Gantry Who is busy baking souls that he may save Everybody's soul but Miranda
She's a Rudolph Valentino fan And she doesn't claim to understand She bakes brownies for the boys in the band At the bar we're gin & scotchin While the F.B.I. is watching And they're tape recording every other word The Bartender is bleeding Pardon me I was just leaving As another cleaver voice repeats absurd absurd Everybody's talking about Miranda She's a Rudolph Valentino fan And she doesn't claim to understand She bakes brownies for the boys in the band Her name's Miranda Her name's Miranda Her name's Miranda