She wore an apron that was covered in gravy stains She had a little green book, and she had varicose veins I was tired, I was hungry, I was ready to snap She dropped the steaming gumbo right in my lap I was alone, otherwise I would have trashed the place But I was soothed by the Muzak and a beautiful face The meat was chewy and the chicken was bland I'm not a pigeon, but she had me eating out of her hand And I feel, and I feel, and I feel like a milkshake I never ordered a slice of life ala mode What I need is an earthquake I could hide in a crack in the road And I feel like a milkshake She started sponging my pants, it really tickled She took my plate and sank her teeth into my pickle She sat down in my lap and started picking my teeth She was naked as a baby underneath We were lost in a dream on a bed of fluffy rice When I was grabbed by the chef, he had a grip like a vise He had gold medallions and a hairy chest
I gave him back his wife, but he was still depressed And I feel, and I feel, and I feel like a milkshake I never ordered a slice of life ala mode What I need is an earthquake I could hide in a crack in the road And I feel like a milkshake I tipped heavy so they wouldn't think the English were mean. I saw a ground beef patty hit the coffee machine I could tell this gorilla was the moody kind I could have used a doggy bag, but I changed my mind One of these hungry days when my luck runs dry I'm gonna meet that Great Soda Jerk in the sky He'll set the blender for that final frappe Wipe the fudge from his beard, and then he'll probably say Do you feel, do you feel, do you feel like a milkshake At the end of your slice of life a la mode? We could split a devil's food cake But the man with the van never showed So we'll both have a milkshake