When you think about our lives -
Screaming kids and nagging wives:
'Can't smoke here - no! not there -
Your bloody f*gs, they drive me spare!
A second bottle? drunken slob,
Off your arse and get a job!
You never take me for a spin -
A little cruise from all the din! '
'You're the bleedin' noise' I scream
Inside my head. I only dream
Of shouting out for fear of what you'd do -
If I could only ball 'F*ck you! '
No, the only way that I can manage
Bearing up against your visage, is
Watching films with hero Arnie -
While drowning in a greasy sarnie.
'Oh to be! ' I wish in sighs:
Arms like his would suit me well -
I'd bust the walls; escape this hell
In which I only just exist;
Getting through by staying pissed.
Agh! the bloody screams again!
And so I crack.
Hang on Arnie,
I'll be back…
Now where's the friggin' telly?
Go on Arnie, give it welly!
Thunder on; it's a-okay -
See how quiet she is today?