Let it rain, bet two Is that the best y'all can do Bet three, bet four, I'll raise you two more The poker table was crowded and heavily enshrouded With the smoke of the player's cigars They were drinking and smoking, and snorting and coking And being watched by two underworld czars There were seven cats playing but only three of them was staying 'Cause the other four dudes had to fold These three studs were hot and had one heavy pot Whilst the other cats hands were cold There were playing five card draw and had won premature And just knew that they had it made So we decided we'd liven up the pot by coppin' a squat Cause we were much more harder to persuade Big Bill Wheeler had been the dealer Along with Spongy and Shy They had played it slick and used the Indian giver's trick Then let the other four cats comply We copped our squats squats, then anted the pot The (?) was set at a grand We sat across one another so we could dig one another And signal when we copped a hand With our motions concealed, we each cut for the deal Then pa**ed around the pot First Spongy and I, then Bill, Spoon, and Shy Who was the first man to come up with a jack Shy broke out a new deck which I asked to inspect Before we all embarked I checked out the front, sides and the back Then let Spoon cut the pack Satisfied that the cards weren't marked He shuffled and dealed with nerves of steel Commanding our quiet respect After receiving my hand, I signaled to my man To open up indirect Spoon coughed back twice, letting me know he was nice Sitting there with three of a kind But first he'd have to lure them in And think they could win By making our attacks combined
Spongy opened for a grand and the play began But not until they paid the price Cause I quickly raised his bet, with my jaws dead set With my face like a sheet of ice It was now on Bill, to a**ert his will And call my raise of twenty But he ended his bout by copping out Saying "That's boo koo buck too many" Spoon diagnosed the effects as his turn came next Just like I expected him to, he didn't call my bet And Shy began to sweat Trying to figure out what he should do And soon realized that he couldn't last So he reluctantly pa**ed And it was now on Spongy again After wiping away his sweat he called my bet Then raised me another ten But by now we had cramped their style And had Spongy's mind beguiled So he didn't know what to do I then folded my hand according to plan Giving Spoon the green light cue Spoon tripled his ten and it was on Spongy again To raise, call, or die The pressure was so great he had to deliberate Before he could get his reply After a five minute stall, he finally called Saying "I'll take two cards my man" Spoon also took two and the tension grew As to who had the better hand Spoon soon signaled with a nod Indicating he had received a card He needed to make four of a kind Meanwhile Spongy had raised him another ten Saying "Its on you my friend" Trying to put my man in a bind But Spoon took it in stride as he quickly complied And dealt with the situation He put his ten G's in the pot saying "Now let's see what you got" Without the slightest hesitation Spongy laid down his hand saying (?) And reached over to scoop the pot But Spoon stopped him cold saying "Its about time you were told Four b**hes is what I got"