She broke up with me, two days later I think she met her Don Juan in, Italy She has a new man, I have a new mustache Now all my friends are gonna call me mountain man And everyone will think that I'm a stupid drifter To walk the earth alone, I'll never shave again On the night she left me, facial hair grew miraculously I dressed in black like Johnny Cash, and grew this beard of shame
I've heard it said she looks a lot like, Sherilyn Fenn And sometimes I'm mistaken for, Billy Gibbons I may appear wise, but I'm an idiot It's over, she left me, and she will soon forget me She found out I was lame, I grew a beard of shame Come all be faithful, joyful and triumphant I am a new man, I have a beard of shame