(Intro: Mediumjay) Get the f** off my couch, n***a! (Hook: Mediumjay) Couch Guy back! Couch Guy back! That's all these b**hes screaming that couch guy's back All eyes on me, While I'm up in yo house My drink ain't got no coaster and my feet on yo couch, n***a! (2x) (Verse: Mediumjay) Pa** them Cheetos, Doritos Empty wrappers from Taquitos Gained a couple kilos, gettin' really comfy doe Man I popped open some pringles, Those crumbs end up on yo shingles Bro can you pa** your laptop I'm tryna log onto Christian Mingle Man I overstayed my welcome, been here bout 5 weeks Haven't moved an inch every time you've seen me My eyelids don't blink whenever I watch yo T.V Hey what's up how's it going that's the extent when we speak When I do get up to take a piss theres a permanent imprint Of my body sorry you had a party and I haven't left since Yo controllers got them orange markings from my finger prints Don't nobody use the bathroom for bout 45 minutes Okay, you probably hate me now, but you used to like me Every time you open the fridge, Half inch of Iced Tea
Blasting my music every time you tryna sleep Never bought no groceries every time I eat for free Started wearing yo jeans cause they fit me perfectly Yo girl friend in the kitchen making grits Well ask her to make some for me! (Hook) (Verse 2: Juice) RING A DING DONG I open up the door To this n***a asking to sleep on my couch like where you from n***a? He comes in anyways without my permission With my daughter and I see them kissing Sleeping on my couch all day and all night I say get out my house you f**in couch guy! Chase him out the house he got a nappy fro He comes back the next day like the cat and the thimble n***a, Da cat came back, The very next day So did the couch guy but he was here to stay n***a! (Hook) (Verse 3: Mediumjay) It's yo family reunion, You tossed a blanket over me They still notice me the way I snore in my sleep Man, My shirt ain't never on and I started skyping with yo mom We laughing cracking jokes how you forget to mow da lawn (Beat: Lil Wayne) An' yo n***a a ho) (Outro: Mediumjay) b**h