And now children, jackanory
Today, the story of sammy and his friends
Read to you by joolz
Sammy wears clothes he got from skips or * shops
He's very dirty, and he scratches a lot
He has his hair in a sort of 'mohecan'
That his girlfriend, ratty, cut for him with a pen knife
Her name isn't really ratty
But she thought it sounded better than: shera lainsworth
She's very thin, and white
And also has a mohecan
That her friend 'snake,' who was susan fletcher, did for her
It's the same greasy black as sammy's
Because they shared the dye that snake stole from boots
Snake has scabies
Sammy doesn't talk to snake
Because he tried to cop off with her, and the stupid cow said no
Sammy wonders just who she thinks she is
Sammy smokes lots and lots of gra**
He lives in a squat in brickston
But he hates black people because they laugh at him in the street
So do white people, come to that
Sammy rolls another joint and wishes that ratty wouldn't sleep with her mouth open
He thinks that she's a stupid cow too
Especially since her parents won't send her any more money
Sammy taps the ash into her mouth
She wakes up and cries
Sammy is sick of her crying
He wishes she'd tidy up the squat, so he'd be more comfortable
Sammy reckons soon, he'll go live in amsterdam
Because the dope is cheaper, and the government takes care of you properly
And he'd get a proper squat with a bathroom
He won't take ratty though
Because dutch girls like english punks
And ratty cries too much
Sammy hates everyone really
But especially people in groups
Sammy would like to be in a group
As long as they were instantly popular and he didn't have to work at it at all
He likes to go to gigs, as long as they're free
Pumps lots and lots of money
Drink lots of cider
Slack everybody off, throw bottles and things at people and then run away
Ratty likes that too, because sammy does
Sammy rolls another joint and scratches his scabies
'goodnight sammy.'
'goodnight ratty.'
'goodnight.'
'goodnight.'
'goodnight.'