He's a serious Mister
Shake his hand and he'll twist your arm,
With monopoly money
We'll be buying the funny farm,
So I'll do flips and get
Paid in chips
From a diamond as big as the Ritz,
Then I'm calling it quits
Calling it quits
Eyes the color of candy
Lies to cover the handicap,
Though your slippers are ruby
You'll be led to the b**by trap,
And there's no prize just a
Smaller size
So I'm wearing the shoe till it fits,
Then I'm calling it quits
Yes I'm calling it quits
Yes I'm calling it quits
Now he's numbering himself among the masterminds
Calling it quits
'Cause he's hit upon the leverage of valentines
Calling it quits
Lifting dialogue from Judy Garland storylines
Where get-tough girls turn into goldmines