[Verse 1]
I'm living in this tiny f**ing apartment
Surprised I haven't gone completely insane
Isolated, like I was living in Platos cave
But I'm the one who put myself in these chains
Staring at the walls as the shadows dance mocking me
Swear to f**ing god they're slowing closing on top of me
Suffocating, how long before they swallow me up?
Why am I wallowing like scum?
Fat trash stacks piled on my bench often
Leaning tower of pizza boxes
Grimy as a gooch, swimming in my own filth
Blinds shut all the time so I can live nude
Beard scruffy, ungroomed, wild on my face
Down under, my pubes, look kinda the same
Nails rough, uncut, gunked with junk
Done nothing productive in months
Hit up p**nhub every single day
Clicking play, drifting away
Jerk off in bed sheets, never wash the sh**
Sleeping within stains of my own frickin' jizz
I'm a f**ing piece of sh**
But I think I love this life I live
Maybe, I don't know, cause even I didn't
I'd be too stubborn to admit it, too lazy to change
Ooh baby I'm lame, who made me this way?
Got no one to blame so I guess it's on me
Man what can I say, probably always be this way
This is me
I do wish that I wasn't a virgin
But I'm not too concerned with tryna get a girlfriend
At least that's what I try to convince myself
Cause I've never felt love or the touch of someone else
The only food I eat is take away
And other sh** that can be microwaved
I stay awake all night, no reason why
k**ing myself, feeling dead inside
Shots of pain rush through my eyes
Used to it now I can push through the grind
Still I'm sure the sh**'s shortening my life
Not great for a guy who's so afraid to die
So afraid to die
And if I went today would I be proud of this life?
Hairy big man, heavy breathing, always eating
Barely sleeping, steady beating my dick
Woah, there goes another weekend
Cycle restarts, repeat it all again, damn
I'm trying to look past it
But I'm dying in this tiny f**ing apartment