He He He (knock knock) Oh sh** he's here Hi 'Uhh how ya doing? Is this the right place for that furniture ahh' Yeah sure is come on in 'Pretty nice place here you got here cobwebs are a nice touch So that's the couch eh?' Yeah we got some um take a look at the upholstry right there 'That's pretty f**ing nice I haven't seen Whoa you all right there' Excuse me real upholstry 'I ain't seen nothing like that since sh** like back in the'...CLUNK Mutherf**a!! YOU WANT MY COUCH?! You muthafu*kA!! I need your mutherf**ing brain! YOU CAN'T HAVE MY COUCH! WHAT THE fu*k YOU THINKIN'?! Now come here you BIG FAT MUTHA fu*kA get on the table! I was never popular this I'll admit, f** school School never liked me, cool All the kids would always beat me till I'm half dead Make fun of the size of my forehead But that sh** never bothered me See momma and mother they owned a lot of property They had a science lab in the basement and that's where my free time ......Well all my time was spent I made a mouse with a chicken head it clucked three times Cluck Cluck Cluck, then it was dead I made a lot of things cool Like a frog with a turkey neck(gobble gobble gobble) it was the sh**, yeah! But I'm still lonely I need a homey So I collected limbs and made me a zombie I could have made a girlie friend But f** that I got my girlie right here(masturbation and moaning sounds) yeah! You can call me mad professor I will make a friend for me You can call me mad professor We will rule eternity 'So this is like where you live?' That's right why you don't like it? 'I mean oh my god it's dirty Do you like'- THUD Hehe Shut up b*tch! GIMME YOUR TIPPIE TOES! I used some many body parts it was crazy I k**ed a whole bunch of muthaf**a's like, what eighty? They all chipped in on my special friend Everything helps even if you got a finger to lend, come on! I hear the other children playing outside "Keep it down you little b**hes I'll skin your f**ing hides" Careful! this part's wack(what?) Somehow I gotta attach this nut sack(eh!)
sh**! f**! I'm sawing off an elbow Looking at the meter my quazar in the low(what?!) Or better yet look out the f**ing window(oh) I see a storm coming it's all most time to roll Screw the head on come on, come on It's the thuggish ruggish Bone OK it's time hit the switch turn it up a hertz f**!! sh**, didn't work You can call me mad professor I will make a friend for me You can call me mad professor We will rule eternity Hey 'Hey you call for a wrecka?' Sure did come on in 'I got the truck running outside I'm gonna go ahead' THUD 'Oww muthaf**a what you'd hit me with a f**ing frying pan or sumthing? what the f**' THUD What the f** bro? You crazy mutherf**a oww that sh** hurts' (Violent J is in pursuit) THUD Come here!! THUD 'I'm gonna f** you up!' Get back here!! 'He's trying to k** me!!' THUD It wasn't always easy(hell nah!) let me tell ya But f** that (err!) cause I ain't no failure(YEAH!) I put the sh** with the veins and stuff with that wait a minute (fart sound) You hear that? Yeah! It's alive(wooo), I just gotta wake it up Hand me that Rock N Rye Pour it in the cup Give it to his a** WAIT HOLD UP pause I ain't cleanin' his draws man f** that! Get him set, get him ready it's all most time Paint his ugly a** face up almost like mine I see him twitching I'm on a roll He can help me tell the whole world about the carnival(wooo!) Turn the hertz all the way up for this sh** And just wait for that (come on come come on come on) lightning bolt to hit Did it work? You make the call! Shaggy? "What up Y'all?!" (triumphant shouts) I'm Alive, I'm alive!! You can call me mad professor I will make a friend for me You can call me mad professor We will rule eternity You can call me mad professor I will make a friend for me You can call me mad professor We will rule eternity You can call me mad professor I will make a friend for me You can call me mad professor We will rule eternity We will rule eternity We will rule eternity We will rule eternity We will rule eternity