When I had my loft Converted back into a loft The neighbours came around and scoffed And called me retro But they are the type Who never used to go to the match Until the family thing got big In the late eighties Dad's a steward in the stand Brace of comps in his hand New men run a creche While home defeats by Jeunesse D'Esch In the Lux Familiar cup Are rendered pointless Stick a burger in my mouth Shove a seat beneath my arse Buy the shirt and shorts and socks Win the keeper's sweaty jocks Point a gun down at your foot Am I supposed to be at home? Friday night and the gates are low And it's raining
ba*tard slip of a sub's ruined my weekend So you came and went ‘Cos on crap three million was spent And if Josh wants a five man tent There must be forfeits Star man said bye bye And now you're reaching for the Sky Sit back relax and watch us die Of entertainment Fiancee said that it was fun Even though the others won I can't stand any more ‘Cos I can't stand anymore You were blind but you will see Tonight's attendance one-two-three Friday night and the gates are low And it's raining ba*tard slip of a sub's ruined my weekend Friday night and I just love complaining And no I haven't got anything better to do