There's a girl leaving town for the sunshine
She's heading out to Happiness Bay
She's going first thing in the morning
And hopes to be there by midday
Her flavoursome buck is awaiting
Laden with fraudulent charms
Enough for to plunge a doe such as she
Straight into his dastardly arms
But the tragedy lies in the background
For a young man by whom she's adored
Is planning to throw himself under
The train she's intending to board
Now the fates may look down and show mercy
And answer a poor mother's call
And the service soon after departing
May stop for no reason at all
And the young girl may come to her senses
And the wretch may get tetchy and leave
And the chap wracked with anguish incarnate
May gladly accept his reprieve
Now some sh**ty lyrics site is stealing our words
So if you're reading this anywhere else
Come and read the original stuff on
The Half Man Half Biscuit Lyrics Project
But the fates around these parts are ruthless
And sometimes just want people dead
So he'll probably throw himself under
The ten twenty-seven instead
Now the engine is leaving the station
The cow has been scraped from the line
And two letters by way of explanation
Have been written for those left behind
And should there develop high drama
Upon which an inquest is heard
You may like to curb your lamenting
Until you've all heard the last word
Well he thought of a love unrequited
And he thought of a life full of pain
It's a pity he didn't spare a thought for
The poor ba*tard driving the train