Ahhh...sweet youth
The joys of becoming a teenage prostitute
Or in my case a blood-crazed gladiator
Til I got stuck on this planet and got hooked
on the weed and the crack and the booze and the pills and the speed
And the s** and the mud and blood and the sh**
Let's go hit the
Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Fat and lame
The claws have been clipped and the tigers been tamed
By a bong, and a schlong
Yes now we have all seen how games can go wrong
My brains filled with bees and my co*k is diseased
Laden with pus it hangs well past my knees
A swarm of narcotics could get me through this
My manager's gonna be pissed
Let's go hit the
Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Oh, can you take it
Yeah, do a monster
Oh, can you deal with it?
We won't respect you unless you get high with the boys
Now I'm old
Strapped in my cell as I cultivate mold
In the twilight of my years
I am still a drug addict
I'm s**ing all night long on a ten foot bong
Moistened with lotion,
wrapped in a sarong I live like a king
but you know that I act like a f*ggot
Once was a warrior, now just a sponge
High all the time got a dick like a muskellunge
My glorious destiny it turned to sh**
Can I get another hit?
From the Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Oh, can you take it
Yeah, do a monster
Oh, can you deal with it?
We won't respect you unless you get high with the boys