[Sang by Scroda Moon, The Toilet, Oderus Urungus, Slymenstra Hymen, and Beefcake The Mighty] [Scroda:] GWAR, I bring forth the portal potty Coming to feed on the sh** from your bodies. Your turds have more power than mere human feces Let's use it's great power to recover the pieces [The Toilet:] Hey! Hey jacka**! Yea You! You got to love me sooo good! Yea, yea you can depend on me Depending on, if my water's on... if my pipe's unglogged... Ahhhhh if you're water-logged... Baby, I am the hole I am your toilet bowl I'll s** your soul Just pay... just pay my sh**ty toll! ahhhh. [Scroda:] Coated in sh** I give all you desire Mystical doorway swimming in mire We'll use the plunger if blockage won't budge It's a door through the plane of fudge [Oderus:] So many times I have found you, still I always piss on the ground Now that I can use you I'm gonna stop f**ing around If you need sh**, then I got sh** On that you can depend I'll pump your stump, you f**in' hump, my crappy, crap-caked friend [All:] The Portal Potty, a gift from the gods Let's pay it tribute and bury our wads [Beefcake:] I think we know what it's all about.
Jiggle the handle and watch something jump out. [Slymenstra:] I am a woman and I have my needs. You can never really know just where or when I'll bleed You need my egg, I need your seed But pray at the altar, the toilet must feed! [Toilet:] Yea, I'll bring ya some s**ers for a k**ing spree Just keep that f**ing tampon away from me. [Slymenstra:] Take in this world, it's sooo beautiful... Filthy humans, you're all so full of it... That which you can't stand you can't understand Speak the mystic words and bring forth a turd you turn around into it and turn over to me. [Oderus:] Cross the river, leave the abyss Give the seat of the toilet a kiss [Beefcake:] Each Virgin sacrifice speaks these magic words. Well, Jiggle the handle, and call forth a turd. [Toilet:] Yea! Here it comes baby, I'm dropping my load I'm ain't just on it, I am the commode! Ahhh! [Scroda:] The power of the toilet must never be abused He must be plunged, he must be sponged, or carnage could ensue. If a dead sheep had clogged him, who knows what could arrive. Maybe it will bring the Master here, wouldn't that be a surprise!