Man in Chair (spoken): Act two of "The Drowsy Chaperone"
begins with this:
a hunting lament of a very depressed bride.
Now, when you are listening to this, um, try to ignore the lyrics.
I know it will be difficult but block them out, they're not the best.
But the tune is beautiful and it truly communicates
the brides state of mind.
Just ignore the lyrics.
Janet (sung): I put a monkey on a pedestal.
And tried to make that monkey stay.
And he did for a time,
but he needed to climb,
and with other monkeys play.
Far away!
He left his jacket on the pedestal.
Beside his tiny rusty cup.
And I haven't got the strength
to pick them up.
Oh monkey, monkey, monkey.
You broke my heart in two.
But I'll always save that pedestal,
for you.
Come my little monkey,
come my little monkey do.
Man in Chair (spoken): The melody is so simple.
It just floats in the air.
And I must confess,
I always get a little misty
when I think of that
tiny jacket, laying there on that pedestal.
It's long sleeves dangling on the floor.
Both (sung): Oh, monkey, monkey, monkey.
Janet (sung): You broke my heart in two.
But I'll always save that pedestal,
Man in Chair (spoken): pedestal,
Janet (sung): For you.
Come my little monkey,
come my little monkey do.
Man in Chair (spoken): Ok, here we go.
Janet (spoken): Wait!
Man in Chair (spoken): Who are you?
Janet (spoken): I'm Janet Van De Graaff!
Man in Chair (spoken): Do you need anyone?
Janet (spoken): I don't need anyone!
Man in Chair (spoken): What about the love of one man?
Janet (spoken): What do I care about the love of one man,
when I am adored by millions!
(sung) Do I need to be so gloomy?
Both (sung): No, no, no!
Janet (sung): I could rule the world
if so I choose!
Sigmund Freud sends flowers to me every show.
Gertrude Stein, she handed me a rose!
Man in Chair (spoken): Now, she really lets go.
Janet (sung): I'm Janet, Janet Van De Graaff.
Ain't no nail that I can't hammer.
Why give up a life of glamour?
Life of glamour!
Life of glamour!
Noooooooo!
Monkey! Monkey!
Man in Chair (spoken): I love this part!
Monkey! Monkey!
Man in Chair (spoken): She's having a complete mental break down!
(sung): Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!
Janet (sung): I'm an accident waiting to happen!
(sung): Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!
Janet (sung): I don't want to show of no more!
(sung): Monkey! Monkey!
Janet: I don't want to spread mirth no more!
Monkey! Monkey!
Janet: Be the greatest on earth no more!
I don't wanna!
I wanna!
I don't wanna!
I wanna!
I don't!
I do!
I don't!
I do!
I don't wanna show off!
All: Stay Janet stay! Janet upon the stage! Janet!
Millions want to see you shine!
Janet: And I think sure, Janet sure, Janet,
future is secure. Janet,
millions will do just fine.
But any future I could ever care to shape.
Includes just one two timin? cad who drives me
ape!
Janet: Oh Robert! What a fool I've been! A hapless
Fool! I know now that I love you, but I've
thrown it all away! I love you monkey! But is
love enough? Is love ever enough?
(sung): That's the story of a monkey gone astray!
Janet: I ask,
Monkey! Monkey!
Janet: the stars,
Monkey! Monkey!
Janet: above.
Is it the monkey or my pedestal,
I love?