[Intro] This one sounds good This one I'll keep I'm saying this rap I'll play this beat Uh-huh. Go! [Verse 1, Jackson] Turning a blind eye, aiding and abetting the badguy Letting him get away with a fresh-baked fruit pie The highs and lows of criminal mischief I don't want to end up on Batman's sh**list So I don't shoplift as much as I want to Wal-mart security cameras haunt you Boosting immunity, magical remedies Presently I'm taking gelatin capsules Of cayenne pepper to step up my rap show Also to vanquish intestinal parasites Choose homemade caramel over Camel Lights I'd rather fatten confectioners' purses Than talk about lung cancer with young nurses Cutco knives don't make for better lives Boycott Mary Kay, let the Girl Scout [strive?] Thai food heat levels now run from 1 to 10
Five is the temperature that I recommend Outfits to wear at night raise the Fahrenheit My shirts promote band names not brand names And I do not display them facetiously Each group was helpful in teaching me [Chorus] [?] Vigilantes on inline skates cleaning up the streets at a break-neck pace The ma**es delight in the crackling sound of the worlds last Applesbee's burning down That's a flash of imagery from dreams No mediocre restaurant machines No coke machines in the middle school hallways No port wine cheese balls on holidays No sports collectibles gracing my walls No bright red phones placing one-way calls If you know what I mean and I think you might You better travel with anti-bacterial wipes [Chorus]