Country has drawbacks The mud and the rain The ticks and the bugs And the rugged terrain You gotta deal with people Who are almost insane Folks who operate with Only part of their brain You left me in the wilderness And ran back to town You just couldn't hack it, girl You really let me down And I thought when we came up here We were gonna settle down Now all I got is weather And a hole in the ground Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well Stick a fork in me, baby Turn me over, I'm done, you can tell Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well If this is heaven what must it be like in hell Well, well, well It all looks so idyllic in the real estate page A handyman special, it's the latest rage It's all you ever wanted, it's the very next stage Get out of the city, stop rattling your cage But look at the reality
And what do you know The schools are bad The restaurants s** There's ten feet of snow And the locals carry handguns And they don't seem to know The difference between A man, a dog or a doe Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well Stick a fork in me, baby Turn me over, I'm done, you can tell Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well If this is heaven what must it be like in hell Well, well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well Stick a pitchfork in me, baby Turn me over, I'm done, you can tell Well, well, well, well Well, well, well, well, well If this is heaven what must it be like If this is heaven what must it be like If this is heaven what must it be like If this is heaven what must it be like in hell Well, well, well, well, well Hey, well, oh, well Well, well