His name's Mike Balls and he's safe you see Just like you and me, he's GLC He's been into soccer violence for quite some time But give him the draw, and he's fine I said Mike: YEAH! Where d'you get your leisurewear? I got my tracksuit from a shop in Aberdare I wears my gold outside of my shirt And I borrowed my sovereign off my Uncle Bert Yeah Mike: You knows it! Where d'you get your trainers from? I won em off a bloke that I smoked off on a bong Yeah I think I know the geezer, I think he's called Pazzo I had to have em they were Silver Shadow My name's Ballsy, come on Japan and Korea I'm going to the World Cup to drink some beer Cause some destruction while I'm here And fcuk some little Thai girls up the rear I've got tickets, for the game with the Argies There's gonna be some argy-bargy I've been into fighting for all of my life And when I gets married I'm gonna beat the wife His name's Mike Balls and he's got a machete He'll cut you into bits until you look like confetti Soccer violence is a game what he plays When he buys the draw it's his nan what pays I'm back, and I'm ringing my bell You'll better not stare cos I'll stare as well And if you get a fcukin stare off me Then you better be a member of the GLC Cos if you're not, then you better sit tight I'll come over to you and I'll start a fight And tell you that my name is fcukin Mike Balls And kick your head against at least 4 walls He's safe, and he's got respect For the GLC crew, to some effect But mess with him, he'll leave your face in a mess His name's Mike Balls - EXPECT NO LESS! Listen Mike: WHAT? Tell me about your chain
It weighs a ton and won't go rusty in the rain Mike Balls: YEAH! What have you got? I've got draw f*gs and rizla and a dose of co*k rot Me Xain and 2Hats were selling some hash This twat had come after our fcukin stash So I hit him in the head with a fcukin pint gla** And shoved a red hot poker up his arse If Mike don't like you then you'll hear the silence It's the Mike Balls school of fcukin soccer violence Mike how d'you organise a fight? I does it by the e-mail in the middle of the night He's Mike Balls AAH YEAH! And he's safe as fcuk Banned from the terraces since the FA Cup I took a bird out to dinner the other night Things went wicked, I got into a fight With 3 fcukin blokes that were looking at her arse So I re-arranged their faces with a fcukin brandy gla** I got escorted out by the fcukin police My bird s**ed them off to help with my release I said you better get tested, she'll give you the clap I'm in the GLC, and this is how I rap He's back: YEAH! Listen to what he's saying I always start a fight no matter who's playing That's right: I'M BACK! And he loves to fight I'll kick you in the head till you lose your fcukin sight He's got a tracksuit, and he wears the gold I'm the hardest man in soccer violence, so I'm told He has to watch the match, on a big screen And at half time I tokes on some green When I'm not on medication, I drive across the nation Organising violence to keep up my reputation You knows it, this is Mike Balls, this is the year 2002, smacking everybody's face in for the World Cup, you knows it! Yeah that's right Mike Balls is back!