Though the world is so full of a number things I'm sure we should all be as happy as But are we? No, definitely no, positively no, decidedly no, uh-unh Short people have long faces And long people have short faces Big people have little humor And little people have no humor at all And in the words of that immortal god, Samuel J. Snodgra** As he was about to be lead to the guillotine Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Don't you know everyone wants to laugh? Ha, ha My dad said "Be an actor, my son But be a comical one" They'll be standing in lines For those old honky-tonk monkeyshines Now you could study Shakespeare and be quite elite And you can charm the critics and have nothin' to eat Just slip on a banana peel
The world's at your feet Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em, make 'em laugh Don't you know everyone wants to laugh? My grandpa said, "Go out and tell 'em a joke But give it plenty of hoke" Make 'em roar Make 'em scream Take a fall, bu*t a wall Split a seam You start off by pretending you're a dancer with grace You wiggle 'til they're giggling all over the place And then you get a great big custard pie in the face Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Don't you know everyone wants to laugh? Make 'em laugh, ha ha Make 'em laugh, ha ha Make 'em laugh, ha ha ha Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh Make 'em laugh