(I don't wanna go on a date Richard
I just wanna meet you face to face-
Face to face)
Richard, Richard
(Richard, Richard, Richard)
Richard, I was raised on your sh**
In 9th grade I had a henna tattoo of your name on my wrist
Every morning I watch Jaws [?]
And thats just the beginning of the list
Liten to this Rich
(Richard)
You're movie Nuts has a 38 on Rotten Tomatoes
But according to Gabe, you're 100
And you better believe that
My Kickstarter to meet you would get funded
But you don't wanna meet me
Why?
Because the villain of RED doesn't want nothing to do with me
I'm sick in the head and Richard thinks that I got lunacy
But theres just two things wrong with me, Rich
I haven't met you yet and I'm still trying
(Richard)
Richard would you make time for me if I was dying?
If I was Give Kids the World would you give me a meeting?
If I was Make a Wish would you take me out to eat
Or give me tickets to a private screening?
In one of your civics talks would you give me preferred seating?
No? Then I'm like your movie Nuts: a failure
But Richard heres two nuts that aren't afraid to tell you
That after this song I'm moving on
(I don't wanna go on a date Richard)
So cancel the restraining order
Tell your sons and daughters on Twitter that I won't bother them any more
'Cuz I'm getting off the sh**ter
Dreyfuss, you're flushed
I'm moving on
And I have a lot of Always memorabilia that I have to go pawn
So Dreyfuss, I'm moving on