He materialized at the edge of my street In a big beater collar Never missed a beat I can you can say that's all where it began He seduced me on my way home from marching band It was 1991 It was the summer of the purple man God only knows we didn't know we did You bet we played that card because we were just kids Re-educated while working on our tans He controlled us with a touch of his purple hand We we're falling one by one It was the summer of the purple man Suddenly the universe was out of whack And once you go there You can't come back And daddy look at you he's gonna have a heart attack "Commence conscription," he said "When I get my hands on that mother f**er Gonna put his purple a** in the ground And weight the f**er I'll tear him limb from limb on a torture rack," The afternoons were spent in nap
The nights were sitting on his lap Feeding him purple beans out of a can Everything went according to his plan It was the last time I had fun Yeah, it was the summer of the purple man Spilling our seeds into the serpent's garden Our young love muscles began to harden That's when mother copped and begged our pardon Cleared her throat and she said "You're such a good little boy And you always want to please us Surely we can fix this with a little more Jesus And pray and pray that purple gay away," Hey Nancy boys this ones for you And the big pink bow from the gum you chew It's such a hoot watching what you turned into As the days fly pa** We'll stand aghast Trapping you in a social impa**e Run out the door just as fast as you can And try to go back to the summer of the purple man