Well I don't have a Bible that weighs eight hundred pounds
And I never pa**ed out flowers at the mall
I have never talked to spacemen or howled at the full moon
Don't have velvet painting of Jesus on my wall ~
Well I don't have a briefcase or wear a three piece suit
And I never ride my bike wearing a tie
I have never shaved my hair off or sacrificed a friend
Don't want my head chopped off and frozen when I die ~
Well Jesus doesn't want me for a Zombie
And He's given me free will so I can choose
I've escaped this world's snare but I don't have to be square
Oh yes, I have become a Christian but I still know how to groove ~
Well I've never played with cobras or walked on red hot coals
And I've never even touched a tambourine
I'm not very good at bingo, I don't worship shiny rocks
No don't have plans to wed my sister named Irene ~
Well I don't pray to statues, not even if they cry
Don't watch that Jesus station on t.v. all day long
Well I've never seen Elvis, don't have six billion kids
And I don't sing through my nose on every song ~
Well Jesus doesn't want me for a Zombie
And He's given me free will so I can choose
I've escaped this world's snare but I don't have to be square
Oh yes, I have become a Christian but I still know how to groove