[Hook x2]
Hi, my name is, what?
My name is, who?
My name is, chka-chka Slim Shady
Hi, my name is, huh?
My name is, what?
My name is, chka-chka Slim Shady
[Intro]
Excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the cla** for one second?
[Verse 1]
Hi kids, do you like violence?
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids?
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did?
Try 'cid and get f**ed up worse than my life is?
My brain's dead weight
I'm trying to get my head straight
But I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate
And Dr. Dre said
"Slim Shady, you a basehead!"
Uh-uhhh!
"So why's your face red? Man, you wasted!"
Well, since age twelve I felt like I'm someone else
Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of gra** and fall on my a**
Faster than a fat b**h who sat down too fast
Come here, s*ut
"Shady wait a minute, that's my girl, dog!"
I don't give a f**
God sent me to piss the world off
[Hook]
[Verse 2]
My English teacher wanted to have s** in Junior High
The only problem was my English teacher was a guy
I smacked him in his face with an eraser
Chased him with a stapler
Stapled his nuts to a stack of papers
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
Extraterrestrial k**in pedestrians
Raping lesbians while they're screaming
"Let's just be friends!"
99 percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doing d** and name it after her
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
And try to touch your hands like some screaming Usher fans
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph
So I signed it:
"Dear Dave, thanks for the support, a**hole"
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
Stop the tape!
This kid needs to be locked away!
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, operate!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
Am I coming or going? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive?
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years
My palms too hairy to hide
Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk
I spit when I talk, I'll f** anything that walks
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
How you gonna breastfeed me, Mom? You ain't got no tits!
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put a bulletproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (Bang.)
I'm steaming mad
And by the way, when you see my dad
Tell him that I slit his throat in this dream I had
[Hook]