[Uncle Dolamite] Come on over hunnie And give your uncle Dolamite a kiss [*kissing Sounds*] Well what you want baby? [Baby] Would you tell me a story? [Uncle Dolamite] You want me to tell you a story? [Baby] Hell yeah! [Other Baby] Me too! [Uncle Dolamite] Yes Hunnie I'm a tell you a story About the bad a** Eazy-E He was drinkin' whisky and gin at the age of three Listen and listen well He's a bad Muthafu- [Mother] Gimmie that god damn book! Here let me read you this one Chrismas in Compton It was a silent night, yes a holy night Until Mr. Claus turned into Santa muthaf**in' right? [Carolers] Deck the halls with balls of holy Fa la la la la la la la la Tis the season to be jolly.... [Eazy-E] Merry Chrismas muthaf**a! [*Gun Shots*] Merry muthaf**in' Chrismas and a ho ho ho! While I'm ridin' that cot under the missle toe Now dashin' through the snow In a candy right top 6-4 Over the hills I go Laughin' at this hoe Nuts on rich and rings Makin' me feel right Oh what fun it is to know That I'm gonna get this p**y tonight So ring them bells, ring them bells Shes takin' it all the way Oh what fun it is to watch her s** my dick this way Hey ring them bells, ring them bells Shes takin' it all the way Oh what fun it is to nut, while she's s**in' my dick Oh yay! Tis the season to get busy Compton crime lick And I'm smokin' on this stick [Santa] Ho ho ho come sit on my face I'm mean lap and tell me what you want for Chrismas Ho ho [Menajahtwa] I want a slay ride A cd player A fifty rum ??? and I'm gonna cum A VCR ???? some p**no flicks Rudolph the red nose reindeer ??? like a everlastin' gobstoper ??? poppa I dig a ho Crack a dough By the nuts oh ???? f**in' in tha snow I made him drop to his knees Yeah you know whats up I said heres some candy canes eat'em up ???? bonapatite with a condom in a tree [] All I want for Chrismas is my two front teeth My two front teeth, my two front teeth All I want for Chrismas is my two front teeth Yo wheres ya rhyme tell me buck wheat
[Buck wheat] Buck wheat is a waskal Thats no Chrismas And all the toys, boys and girls f** ya wishes I got happy over joy in this muthaf**a No indo under my tree so Santa be a s**a ??? when I was young I was the only kid Who had enough guts to be Good ole hearin' on the East I'd stay awake just to let america know That Santa was a fake I used to believe in Saint Dick when Elvis was alive But all the f**in' bullsh** got played when I was five Years oh just stay young, bold datin' Singin' Silent Night Carolin' Recietin' Now all I want for Chrismas is my indo wreath I got my two front teeth Uncle Eazy be the ???? Just spread me a leaf Little kids don't cry When you find out the Santa Claus is just a f**in' lye [Eazy-E] On the third day of Chrismas my homeboys gave to me Three pounds of indo Two birds of c**aine And a A muthaf**in' K b**h [] Eazy-E oh Eazy-E Show us how you treat those b**hes I saw mommy f**in' Eazy-E [Eazy-E] Close the door little b**h I'm gettin' these draws [] I'm a tell my daddy if ya a** don't stop [Eazy-E] I don't give a f** I'm gettin' chrismas caught Ho ho ho and away I go [] Oh Saint Nick got a dick like a ho Well wheres this ???? [Eazy-E] Shut the f** up b**hes And go back to sleep [] Yo black what you want for Christmas? Yo black I want a job ??? corn on the cob But a n***a will eat them chicken, and Chitlens, watermelon, corn bread and some food Whos climbin' in my window Smokin' up indo My carin' and high make a high know [*A lot of mumblin'*] Yo black what you want for Christmas? Yo black I want some cash So I can buy some indo, some chronic and some hash [] A rump pa pump pump A rump pa pump pump [Every One] Merry Muthaf**in' Chrismas Merry Muthaf**in' Chrismas Merry Muthaf**in' Chrismas And have a f**ed up new year (x4) [Eazy-E] You Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!! [Mother] And they all went to prison And lived f**ed up lives ever after The End