[Round 1: Caustic]
First of all, he's gonna spit a bunch of bars he had for this guy Dirt
And after that corny sh** he's probably gonna freestyle about my hat or my shirt
And that sh**'s cool and on the average fan it might work
But let's discuss your f*ggot a** life first
Listen up herpie dick
I am not QP or Jerzey Swift
Save your f**ing Dirt bars you will not do me dirty b**h
You're f**ing-trying to get on me like I'm on some unworthy sh**
The sad part is you're probably gonna stalk Murda Mook until you're 36
I am whiter, than the flags you use to surrender
I am tighter, than the Locksmith bars you should've remembered
I over viewed your Al-Qaeda application and you can't be a member
Because Lebanon is the only Arabic country that does not have a desert
Look, he's trying to intimidate me with some kind of crazy d**h stare
And it's working cause your eyebrows look like Zangief's chest hair
You sweat so much I think I've discovered why
You thought it would be a good idea to grow a mustache above your eyes
I met your girl outside
For a skinny chick she's got some thunder thighs
I'll make that chick say "hi" to my dick like a Chris Brown double time
I don't wanna f**ing freestyle, but I have to guys
Cause he f**ing reminds me of the Snapple guy
The f**ing-your giant dark eye sockets have grown to a raccoon size
Which is probably the only way you'll ever see the world through a black dude's eyes
He's already pulled the sh** before
Y'all remember Vision?
Acted like that sh** was short notice with some sh** that was already written
Well, I'm expecting some generic disses, so let's get technical with him
My incredible writtens will have you in a paramedics equipment
Hoping you're f**ing dying like you just got sentenced to life in prison
Your f**ing eye-off the head I will rip him
If my Beretta clips him you'll be a f**ing vegetable living brain dead like Jessica Simpson
This is not Above The Rim or whatever stupid 2Pac movie that you pretend that you live in
If it meant that you'd fit in, you'd probably forget your terrorist mission and tell us you're Christian
You will not go H.A.M. on me b**h it is against your religion
But I've already accepted tradition
And when you're dead I'll put a sheet over your head like the rest of your women
You rap, like you forgot your meds and you're tripping
So go get a prescription from a demented physician
You got a f**ing problem with chemical mixing
You got a heavy addiction
You got a chemistry set in your kitchen
You're basically a meth-amatician
f**ing p**y
f**ing-leave your girl around me, that f**ing s*uts getting raped
And since she looks like a donkey
Right before I finish I'm punching her in the face
You spit your vicious lines around winter time
Cause when all the white kids got presents it made you sick inside
So when you wanna diss a guy because his skin is white
You just sound really pissed off about Christmas time
You talk a big sh** but you're too b**h to commit the crime
You wouldn't shoot a pig if you're f**ing [?] is from District 9
Remember when we went to N.Y.?
And Hollow was talking about tapping you in the jaw
Yeah, well you stood up to Math and man that took some balls
So I gotta give you props man, you were ready to stand against all
Even when you had your back against the wall, back against the wall, back against the wall, back wall!
(How much time do I got?)
Back against the wall, back against the wall, back against the wall!
You f**ing...stupid b**h
You will f**ing never make it in the music biz
So don't ever f**ing call me white, you are browner than human sh**
[Round 1: Dizaster]
My name is Caustic, I've been wanting someone top tier my whole life
For as long as I've been battling
So excuse me if I'm a little emotional right now cause I can't believe this is happening
I mean this cat has been wanting to battle me for ages
So when I heard you were battling with Basic
I was like, "Damn, this f**ing cat is racist."
I bring nothing but disastrous terror
Yeah, you came with a bunch of good lines but you had to sound like me
sh** I felt like I was battling myself in the mirror
Yeah I got a bunch of white jokes cause white people rub me the wrong way
They told me, "Caustic got an album you should let his song play."
f** no! I'd rather go in and out of security at the airport all day
See my rhyming is perfect and I don't gotta try to rehearse it
When you're applying your verses I'm thinking, "Why does this nerd spit?"
You should be outside slitting your wrist or screaming, "I hate Lord on a skateboard
Trying to curb flip cause your insides are whiter than bird sh**
I got a k**er instinct to make sure my enemies don't spit no more
You got a k**er instinct too, except the difference yours is intended for strictly a Nintendo 64
You say you getting money, your CD is in the stores
Your albums out, you k**ing tours but b**h you live in port
Like civilians in Singapore during the middle of a civil war
I spit that sh** that make you listen more
This ain't a rap battle, I came to strip you for that little b**h that's hidden in your core
Man, I can see your future right now trying to get divorced
In a civil court cause you caught your b**h having intercourse...with a horse
Man, that little b**h's bird chest is riddled with titty warts
Probably why she likes to get f**ed while she's getting pissed on by a little midget dwarf
So act up...and get split with force
Get stabbed up....then get wrapped up like an Egyptian corpse
I'll terrorize your studio, beat your f**ing engineer down 'til his ribs are sore
And strangle you to d**h with the extension cord that links from your mixing board
I'll kick your door down dressed up as a conquistador, equipped with a ninja sword
Put your little sister in a figure four
Then give her the option to either s** my dick or kiss the kitchen floor
She took the dick of course
You got the image of a [?]
Try to get into a scrimmage with a Minotaur
I should k** you for every single time you ever stole a f**ing candy bar from my father's liquor store
You have to be kidding me
I mean this cat here is k**ing me
Looking like a f**ing handicapped aborigine
You wouldn't last for a minute in an active vicinity
I'm drowning you fast, asphyxiating your a** instantly
In an everlasting river of a** kicking delivery
I'm past sick
I'm 'bout to collapse the facility
I was never racist against white people this is what battling did to me
So if you wanna get on that bullsh**, get tough and try to scrap with me physically
Then you gon' leave this f**ing battle looking like you got into a tackling injury
Look maggot
It's not the fact you ain't sh** to me
It's like, I don't understand how you could battle so viciously when dad looks like a Jake Gallagher mini-me
Wait a minute, he has an epiphany
You never robbed someone or ever attacked someone viciously
The only thing you've ever taken is a f*ggots virginity and it was a tranny named Tiffany
I should shoot you in your face to put your fam' out of misery
For having a kid who thinks he could actually make it battle rapping in a-
f**ing living in this backstabbing industry
Yeah I f**ed up
But that doesn't change the fact that you're b**hing and your uterus hurts
After this, dude bro, we could totally take shrooms and you could tell me how the universe works
This sh** is ludicrous
I'll aim the thing and shoot at you first
Fatally make you bleed til you stain your jeans, boots and your fur
sh** is make believe, things you only do in your verse
So I'd rather talk about greater things like your girl's beautiful skirt
Or the fact that I can blatantly see her b**bs through her shirt
When I was barely 16 I put in units of work
Way before this fiend knew it was purp'
Way before Project Blowed changed their scene and moved to Lemerk
He's talking through my sh** cause he's a f*ggot and this sh**'s about to get worse
Don't f** me up homie
Man, ain't nothing you could say to me or do could be worse
I'm sick of this studying voodoo in church
Man, you gon' be hanging from a medical noose in a nurse
God damn it I almost ruined my verse
f*ggot Caustic
You look like a child rapist with your receding hair
I know I'm judging you by your image this sh** isn't even fair
But what about the fact you're trying to drag kids to your secret lair
And you keep 'em there?
C'mon you can't tell me you haven't f**ed a child man
Why you trying to lie fam'?
What about that one night stand you had in Thailand?
You're trying to cover sh** up
You're trying to cover sh** up like my four wives back in Iran
Could you imagine being a kid like DNA?
Young as him around this dude and all the dangers to his life span?
sh**, to get rid of his life I wouldn't even have to shake him with a knife fam'
All it would take is a stranger in a white van waving a bag of Lifesavers in his right hand
[Round 2: Caustic]
You rapping slow huh?
I love L.A. but I'm not mad at a free visit
The only thing wacker than your cheap gimmick
Is the fact that we had to listen to listen to you rap for three minutes
You do not f**ing fear me
You f**ing-nah you shouldn't
But you don't say sh** clearly
You wanna know how the universe works?
Ask your girl it starts with a big bang theory
You wanna make skateboard jokes fine
I f**ing get 'em all the time
But your b**h must be into skaters
Cause she sat on my face and did a nose grind
We in southern Cali right?
I guess I gotta get on my esse swag
Just cause you rap about shooting people doesn't make you less of a f*g
You say you got pumps you're probably dressed in drag
Don't make me put the Eagle to your center like a Mexican flag
Dizaster...needs his mommy
Don't make me grab and squeeze the shotty
I'll let the metal splash against your body like a Japanese tsunami
Absurd is your only groupie
How can they be mad at me when you be decapitating marines in your family's home movies
(Oh, I'm pissing people off)
f** this f*ggots sh**
You ain't matching wits with my man*scripts
I'll pop outta the darkness with a buck knife on some Rambo sh**
So f** a Dizaster
If I have to I'll battle Los Angeles and come back to this motherf**er with a distant planets battle ship
You're not a f**ing disaster you're an accident
Every time you say the words "smash the whip" your dad gets pissed
You have never hi-jacked a jet so don't start talking that Iraqi sh**
I bet if your girlfriend shaved it into a landing strip
You'd probably crash your dick
I am from the future demonstrating how to rap correct
Non fiction that you haven't read about sh** that hasn't happened yet
And in the future, you're still an overrated f**ing battle vet
Because labels are like FEMA, they will never write Dizaster checks
If there's problems with you and I then you walking into suicide
Your dogs will get put to sleep, your llamas get euthanized
The shotty remove your mind, your body in suit and ties
I might shoot one of your f**ing wives while she's walking to junior high
I mean, you a f**ing front b**h
You ain't a palming the Ruger type
If anything you're probably one of those Call of Duty guys
Catch a body and hit the walkie talkie like, "target neutralized."
These problems will never die
So I'ma put this MC in a box and rip your heart out of your f**ing chest
And watch it beat til it stops
When this battle's over
There should be some kind of ending sequence you watch
That says, "You just defeated the queen of Iraq...achievement unlocked."
[Round 2: Dizaster]
Yo man, I'm not even from Iraq
I mean, c'mon I wanna-
As soon as I heard him say that I wanted to say something back
But that sh** was f**ing wack I can't even rebu*tal that
Man, you are part of an embarra**ing rap group
Your girlfriend has terrible tattoos
That b**h looks like Erykah Badu if she was wearing a fat suit
And your parents are wack dude
They're on everything from h**n and crack too
Anything you can find underneath the stairs or be prepared in a bathroom
Apparently that's you
The type of guy that will totally go out to the middle of nowhere and take mad shrooms
And like totally smootally wear this hat and it's like totally made out of hair from a raccoon
You're a f**ing degenerate f*g
That sh** you said about putting the piece to my chest like a Mexican flag
When you pronounced "Mexican flag" you sounded like your confederate dad
Improvise doom, consume flesh to rejuvenate
Resume your steps, headed towards d**h trying to recuperate
Ain't no telling when the eye in the sky will illuminate
You work a 9 to 5 and wonder why I rhyme and I'm moving weight
It's time for I to commit a homicide in a neutral state
Your whole image been personified as a huge mistake
Wonder why he shouldn't f** with I, removing your waist
You a guy that wears a size two in the waist
Your f**ing crew's a disgrace
You dudes are shady
Your music makes me wanna abuse and rape a little Jewish baby
The fuse of hate? I use them daily
I'll use the hate as fuel to make me use your face as a tool to break the rules of safety
I'll flip the f** out, I'm going cuckoo crazy
I'm hot wiring your new Mercedes
I'll flipping out like the white boy from Rampage
Run up open fire on a group of ladies
Cause you look like you bought your shoes from Macys
Introducing Jason, give up your soul, pray to the Mason
[?] a new replacement
I don't give a f** if it's you or who's in your place b**h
You catch two in your frame b**h
You and Cortez AKA Julio Iglesias
I don't play kid
You start yapping outta place then I react like I'm in The Matrix and slap you in your face quick
Making your retract your statement faster than you can actually make it
I'll take your b*tch and I'll scrap with her naked
Then I'll choke slam her back to the pavement
And cave man style drag her b**h a** to the basement
Hack her and stash her in random places
Then wait for her parents to come back from vacation
And mail them f*ggots the remaining half of her bracelet
Yeah, you act like you're happy but you're not, just f*ggot just take it
You're like, "It's only so far that Dizaster can take the sh**."
Shut the f** up you asked for this a** whipping, you were acting flirtatious
Instead of climbing the ladder like a man and being actually patient
You took your first chance to battle Dizaster and you had to just take it
f*ggot!
You will never get no one that's top tier
"C'mon I want someone that's top tier
I mean, can you guys not hear, I'm literally about to drop tiers/tears."
You have a big a** nose and some long ears
You're a redneck whenever he's not near, a cold can of tall beer
As far as you wondering why you never got someone that's top tier
Cause you spent most of your time mowing the lawn on your John Deere
There's nothing you can say to me
G-g-g-g-g-getting ready to blast off
At the same same same same same time when you're f**ing sweating and t-t-t-taking your hat off
Yeah, motherf**er I'm an Al-Qaeda activist, I'll blast you with a rocket
So shut the f** up and stare at me like that and keep your hands in your pocket
Yeah
I'm the mic murderer, might murder ya, lighting you up it's curtains
You're light work
It's a nice verse
I strike first or it's vice versa
See me with a f**ing long knife and a white burka
See me on sight then I might derka...derka...derka
Unlined circuit, clockwork Al-Qaeda insurgents
Sliding by customs with a timed bomb tied to my turban
Battling Grind Time's Pee Wee Herman
Who likes to spend most of his time listening to Sublime and drinking Heinekens with Germans
Riding by lurking in a white suburban, 45 bursting
And make your whole entire Earth spin like you getting caught in a giant whirlwind
And the reenactment of me sliding inside of your girlfriend
Yeah, go fu*k YOURSELF
This heat is making everybody melt
You've been talking about my girl at least she came here with me, where's yours?
Probably out there f**ing every else
What else?
You will never be sick
You better run and get your medical kit
Long knife sever your head and your dick on some pro feminine sh**
I don't need men, I got plenty of chicks
That will run up on you fast while you're pumping gas at 76
Punk your a** and have s** with your b**h
I can't believe you took that effort to spit that corny a** irrelevant sh**
This is you, your chance, I thought you'd be ready equipped
Your whole life you aimed for the best and you missed
If I was you I would eventually quit
Cause all you do is set goals for your life that never get hit
Like a celibate chick
Your whole life has been one big ecstasy trip
Trying to hit me with a disease til you realize the one I got is 10 times sicker than the one you attempted to infect me with
This is it
I got a couple more words this f**ing match is over
You're a f**ing f*ggot poser
You just want me to autograph your Dizaster poster
You know what? I'ma say more sh**
Yeah, cause you said some sh** about the tsunami
That's an emotional situation and I don't wanna have to come ruin it
Y'all heard about the Japanese disaster and I know what y'all thinking
I swear I had nothing to do with it
Cause homeboy, here's a reminder
If I did have something to do with it then the earthquake would've struck in China
Everyday of my life they quarantine me down and force me to hibernate
Cause I put lives at stake any and every time that I'm awake
California is at risk of me letting off a violent quake
Aftershock of seismic wakes striking the coastline a couple of thousand miles away
Giving rise to a tidal wave that'll wipe away the whole entire race
And submerge the fu*k outta the Hawaiian state
Dizaster
What the f** is you crazy?
I'm known to cause earthquakes I'll turn this place into a Haiti
Talk about my eyebrows
Talk about the clothes I wear
Yeah you can talk about my eyebrows I don't care
But as far as my nose hairs
You better not go there