The only thing keeping my head from exploding After being shot with thE gun that I'm loading Is the music that fills both my ears to their limits And the sounds that compile the tune into its Polyrhythmic polymelodic Sporadic and episodic Moments of beauty that make life worth Those awful moments that truly truly hurt It's not convincing enough I think I'll take the easy way out I hope that the future is nothing like right now My fingers are blistering and my nails curl down Over my fingertips to tap on my eyelids Waking me up in the morning like aphids On tomatoes and lettuce that grow in your garden Where I steal all the fruit before surfaces harden And make it impossible to break with my weak teeth Without losing them all before biting what I want to eat It's too hard to do the things I need to pull off soon before I lose energy And fall crashing into the roofs of the homes of The grown-ups and families that interact without love
All of them adults whom I knew as children When their hair was so dirty and faces so willing Would walk up to vans where candy was offered And never be seen after promises honored Goodbye small babies, abortion survivors! They live only to grow up to be liars Who steal from my house in the night And tell me that they are my only escape From the world that burns slowly and turns on its border Like tops that never stop even after The guns poke their foreheads into bedroom windows And peek around smiling at potential widows To witness the writhing that follows rejoicing At parties where drinking brings all outside noise in Results in authorities breaking in bedrooms To take husbands outside to be shot under the moon Line up all the wives in the night And tell me who they are So I can call out to them As their families are burned in public In the field! In the night! Stretching to day