I wanna vomit on your Black T-shirts That advertise metal bands The children you Conceived in 9th grade In football stands The mall is breathing With motley heavings of crowd interaction Metal belt girls Hair dye colors gauged ears Lick winter tire traction Break me out another Bottle I Haven't started buzzing yet You'll be a policeman The way you give orders I'll take that bet That in twenty minutes I'll be right in this Couch Thinner and younger and better You'd better Start the count At the bottom of the barrel
I'll sit with my friends At the bottom of the barrel I'll count my blessings Always look on the bright side of life! Not just the ends At the bottom of the barrel Count me in Now that you've gained weight And been to prison I hope you've learned a lot 'Cause I'm still jealous And fat and lazy and stupid and useless and drunk and ugly And my forehead is hot What have I given Just to be able to say That I am closer To being alive With nothing left But Herzog and the idiot