Well, it seems I've come home, Stormy
To the same old gruesome show
It sets my teeth on edge
The way you glow
Your skin beads like a julep
And the bed's in disarray
The room reeks like a wedge of Camembert
Left out on a sultry day
Now it's not that I'm by nature so vicious
As to jump at any chance for a fight
But your silence is so dark and delicious
Makes me wonder whether something's not right
So come sit like a good girl
Let the game begin
And I'll try to keep my temper
As you fill me in
Has somebody been here before me
Mocking my bed
Making love to you
Just tell me his name now, Stormy
I've got a job to do
Don't tell me how much you adore me
In your own sad strange way
I'm certain that you do
Just tell me his name now, Stormy
I do it all for you
There was Buzz the neurosurgeon
With the blood stain on his sleeve
Who thought you live alone
But had to leave
And Chan the connoisseur
Who did such brisk business in erotic prints
And his partner Reinhardt Kohn
The Euro-pimp
Whom no one's heard from since
You've a figure nothing less than disarming
A smile like God never saw
A s** appeal so raw it's alarming
Oh, you're perfect except for one tiny flaw
Well it's time that you took a bit of sage advice
And you shouldn't keep such secrets
When I ask you nice
So who was it this time, Stormy
Swallowed your tongue
Took your breath away
Just tell me his name now, Stormy
Or there'll be hell to pay
Don't wheedle, cajole, or implore
It's easy as sin
Why do you tremble so
Just tell me his name now, Stormy
I've got a right to know
Was it Adam and Eve's rude expulsion
Caused the stars at my birth to align
And brought me someone whose compulsion
Was so perfectly suited to mine
There was Angel from the Bronx
Who moved like Buddha on the ballroom floor
And called four times a day
But calls no more
They found Ellis in a Glad bag
With a ginsu nestled in his gorge
And the boy form Uruguay
That washed ashore
Whom you called George
It might take Columbo to solve them
These pictures that burn in my head
It might take a Freud to absolve them
All that's needed is that one common thread
Someday d**h will obliterate our mutual pain
Until then I reiterate the same refrain
Has somebody been here before me
Mocking my bed
Making love to you
Just tell me his name now, Stormy
I do it all for you
Don't tell me how much you adore me
In my own sad, strange way
I'm certain I'd agree
You've told me his name now, Stormy
Just leave the rest to me