I was sitting in the back yard s**ing on a Good Humor
Along comes a Doc, says my wife has a tumor
And it was malignant
Now the AMA and the medical highers
They don't agree with Liggette & Meyers
They say smoking is bad for you
Hell of a cough, too
Well, there is cancer of the liver; there is cancer of the lung
Cancer of the lip, the throat, the tongue
There's 17 malignant tumors in one filter tip king size
Now light up
Well, a cigarette was needed that was relatively clean
They come out with filters, low tar & nicotine
All that research gone to waste
No harmful ingredient, no cigarette taste
Well, the companies panicked, they had to find an answer
They increased the tobacco strain and everybody's getting cancer
Look what I got free with these cigarette coupons
A chest X-ray
Well, the hashish interest in Mexico
Has found a way to redouble their dough
Let's all get the habit, marijuana's here to stay
So if you want a treat and you don't mind the treatment
Smoke pot! It's the thinking man's cigarette