You know? When I ain't spittin' I'm out fightin' crime 'Cause I'm bad like that, uh [Verse 1] Caped crusader Stay souped with lasers A gray deuce-deuce that I used to blaze I slayed spooked troops in my youthful days And flew away in the Spruce Goose, ruthless ways Now you could say my style was aloof but hey I gotta stay elusive And that's why I moonlight as a producer, slash rapper Slash a**-kicker, ridiculous rat ba*tards Face down on the gravel, have gun will travel Out the blue steel barrel, get ya crew k**ed Harold from Peru filled the streets with pills for weeks Had his operation based in Brazilian suites Women swimmin' in counterfeit bills with grills for teeth And had a half a mil' concealed beneath Building B Ugh...received word they on the block I got the call on my two-way radio watch It was a Tuesday, shoes laced, gazed at my clock Hope I can ruin their clientele in time to catch Seinfeld Crime prevails daily, it's a hundred fanatics That's why my hip's equipped with guns and gadgets That's why my lip is stiff, no one can match it That's why I dip whenever the sun comes, had it With Harold and his shenanigans, everyone's frantic When they peep the piece and the heat I brandish Shut 'em down son, took 'em to police then vanished I made it home but I just missed Costanza's antics, dammit! Such a job is selfless But the mayor feeds me eggs, corn cobs and shellfish Rebellious for the hell of it, villains audacious I'm still in my spaceship, I know that I can fly with my cape But that's some lame sh**, I'm cooler than that
Preservin' justice, just show me where the hooligans at And this is my hooligan r-r-r-rap [Danny! talking] And you know they don't give a brotha no superpowers So I gotta keep more gats than a Papoose verse You feel me? [Chorus: *scratches by Danny!*] - 2X "D-D-D. Swain..." - Danny! "...r-r-rhyme Writer..." - Street Life "The best...best...the best looking crime fighter..." - Will Smith [Verse 2] In the daytime he's meek and mild-mannered But the D. Swainmobile is sleek and piled with hammers I got a slick pistol that I nicknamed Crystal Her thick frame bristles when I exchange missiles For some quick pain, whistle at her, see if she don't snub you I keep the broad around but I don't ever say "I love you" I stay between gats and my laser beam hats George Bush the bu*ton to thwart a crook, it's nothin' I got a fly chick as a sidekick Always on her Sidekick, tryin to find some Jordan-signed kicks I try to give her leeway; lost my utility belt Assed-out for three days, she copped a new one from eBay Heesheeeay! Blowticious, villains so vicious Mutated goldfishes, magicians and old witches, and Islamic crooks with atomic hooks I done battled all of these cats, and still ain't no comic book! Look! ("we don't believe you!") I know you hear my flows and doubt it Don't believe me? Ask Edna Mode, she's the broad that sews my outfits The sensational, back is the +Incredible+ D. Swain the Vigilante, back-handin' criminals ..but don't tell nobody [Chorus]