Then get this right? I'm driving along man I'm driving as I'm driving
I'm driving safely. I'm obeying the rules..of the road
Whatever sign comes at me I look at it and I go ..Ok. you got it, sign
Right so I'm driving safely all of a sudden a guy in another lane
Compeletly oblivious to me. He starts coming into my lane
JUST COMING IN And if I didn't see him coming in..accident
But because I saw him..ah I see HEYY Right i see
I a**ess the situation. I see I a**ess the sit-u-a-tion
And then I uh eased on the brake. As he's coming I ease
And I said what anybody here says automatically when this happens
You can't help it. It just comes out, ready? ready?...
Um, Hello?
...Um, Hi? Hello? Unless you're black. If you're black it's a little different
If you're black it's uh check out this mothaf**a..check out this
Mothaf**a!
If you're chinese it's *screech* *crash* So that's...that's nice
**********************************************************
I go to a car accident. I got in this car accident recently right?
Not my fault! This car accident was not my fault
Right but you know how it goes...Get in a car accident
Even if it is not your fault. The other person, they get out of their car
Look at you like it's your fault. Even if it is CLEARLY their fault
They get out. They're like. Alright, why did you stop at a red light
And let me hit you doing 80?! WHY DID YOU STOP AT A RED LIGHT?
Then you get out right? You go you start looking at the damage
You start looking. Keep looking at each other and back at the damage
Will you please come and look at my damage with me sir?
If we look together maybe some magic will happen
This is horri- feel this! This even feels damaged!
Do you have tools, can you fix this right now?
This is horribly- this feels so horribly damaged
Even if I was blind I would know this is horribly damaged
By the way it feels
Then you gotta exchange the information right?
That s**s cuz nobody ever has a f**ing pen. You stand there
Do you have a pen- I don't have a pen...Can you remember all my sh**?
Do you have a lipstick or something? A crayon?
Right? So when you finally... here's what happens
You finally get information going and you print your stuff nice and clean
There you go..there's my. I highlight. Everything's nice
You give him the... there you go. It's in an envelope. Ugh yeah
Nice and - But then you get their information and it looks like
They were having a f**ing seizure while writing it
You're like dude you got like a 28 digit phone number going on here buddy
And under name you drew a picture of a monkey f**ing a coconut
What is that? Is your name Monkey f**ing a coconut sir? MFC? is that you?
MFC? That's a monkey... that could be a melon looks like a coco-nut
Then you take a second..here's where it starts getting embarrasing right?
You take a second while you're doing the exchange
You just look around for a second and there's people EVERYWHERE
They're like building bleachers on the sidewalk and sh**
People coming out of bushes... What? Accident?
I'm gonna watch for awhile! Wow! They're discussing it right there!