You guys ready? We want everyone in the whole f**in' place to jump up and down a'right? Even you guys up there...stand up! Huh! Huh! Hey! Try to pretend that you are comfortable I guess I know you better than you think Try to pretend that you are far away I guess I better buy you a stiff drink How could you try to forget what we once had Better not tell anyone it was bad Sorry I can't get any further away You better deal, 'cause I'm gonna stay Next to you, I never wanted to, but now that I'm Next to you, I just can't help myself being Next to you, there isn't anyone else That I would rather do (Hey!) Try to pretend that you don't get a small chill Every single time that I pa** you Try to pretend that you don't want a big thrill Even half as much as I know you do I knew you couldn't forget what you once had Even though it ended so awfully bad I'm sure the second round won't end the same way You'd better hope, 'cause I'm gonna stay Next to you, I never wanted to, but now that I'm
Next to you, I just can't help myself being Next to you, there isn't anyone else That I would rather do (Hey! Huh! Huh! Huh!) Try to pretend that you are comfortable I guess I know you better than you think Try to pretend that you are far away I guess I better buy you a stiff drink Don't think of running away, 'cause I'll catch you And make you sorrier than you ever knew I know I've lost it, I don't care, so anyway You'd better deal, 'cause I'm gonna stay Next to you, I never wanted to, but now that I'm Next to you, I just can't help myself being Next to you, there isn't anyone else That I would rather do (Hey!) Next to you... Next to you... Next to you... Next to you So...do any of you have the "Short Music for Short People" comp? (Applause) Oh, good. For those of you who don't have it, it's 101 of your favorite mostly Punk bands doing their own 30-second songs. So, this is our 30-second song...