See me? I stepped straight off the rugby pitch Pierced my cauliflower ears With the ugly stick Fed up of scrummages Where funny kids would hug me quick I thought "I need a new sport" Then it suddenly clicked I'd jump ship As soon as I could find a good port Head to the States And get a taste of college football I'm standin' out I make a talent scout say "Hang about! This is the man That we've been tryin' to hatch a plan without?" A British rugger lover Over on shore leave The kid's a lucky bugger My clover's four-leafed So don't ignore me I'm on the road to glory Rollin' over rows of foes Like a coach and horsies If only I was coachin' your team Raw meat, I throw the ball deep Into enemy territory Takin' on all teams The very best from each college I'll tackle them so hard They'll never eat solids Demolish your defence Leave them in the deep end
It's D-Day The invasion of D-A-N Check those credentials Pro potential My flow's torrential So whatever you throw in my direction Is inconsequential Techniques are confidential You wanna step to me? Please, come on, be sensible Petty fools Try to knock me off my pedestal Like the heavy fall You're inevitably headed for Reignin' forever So you better head indoors My whole rhyme's a goldmine Fetch the Seven Dwarves "Good heavens, Lord What else do you have in store?" I got it locked Knock knockin' up on heaven's door This is the situation A British pitch invasion Bringin' everythin' except the kitchen sink Sorry, "kitchen basin" And this is just the initiation Of the Brit invasion A bit of vindication For the fact I never had an invitation Still reignin' forever Precipitation A little bit of titillation