My dear, I'm awful shorry 'Bout gettin' home sho late. I orra been in hoursh ago; But you know how I hate To biss a crit of micket (Shuse me) I mean to say, To criss a mit of bicket Cricket! Ash right. Hooray! In-toshicated? Nonshense! Just need a lirrle rest. I shush been round to Johnson's place Lish'nin' to the Test. Great game! It's nervish teshion Has made me feel like thish. You know how I like cricket I wouldn't bit a mish. Hooray for Misher Bra'man!
Anurraa fourer hit! Hoo - what? Don't be inshultin'! I'm norra leash bit lit! Not even s'ightly shrozzled. Jush had a lirrle spot Each time they hirra fourer Mean to call tharra - lot? My dear, don't get - hic - cited, I wouldn't hissa mit. Three sheers for good old Washaname! Anurra boun'ry hit! ... Hic! Struse me, love. Per-haps you're right, I berra gessum rest. Jush beein - Hum! You know, Jolson's place Lish'nin' to - the Test.