Queen Elinor was a sick woman
And afraid that she would die
When she sent for two friars from France
To come to her speedily
When the King he heard the Queen had sent
For friars from o'er the sea
He called his noble Earl Marshal
To come to him speedily
Do you put on one friar's coat
And I'll put on another
And we shall to Queen Elinor go
One friar like another
Oh God forbid, said Earl Marshal
That such a thing would be
If I should beguile Madame the Queen
Then hanged I would be
And the King he swore upon his oath
His scepter and his crown
That whatsoever Queen Elinor said
He would not write it down
And thus attired they both did go
Till they came to Whitehall
The bells did ring, and the choristers sing
And the torches did light them all
Be you two friars of France, she said
As I suppose you be
But if you be two English friars
Then hanged thou wouldst be
We are two friars of France, they said
As you suppose we be
And we have not been at any ma**
Since we came over the sea
The first vile sin that ere I did
To you I will unfold
Earl Marshal had my maidenhead
Underneath this cloth of gold
That is a vile sin, said the King
God may forgive it thee
Amen, amen, quoth Earl Marshal
With a heavy heavy heart spoke he
The next vile sin that ere I did
To you I'll not deny
I brewed a pot of poison strong
To poison King Henry
That is a vile sin, said the King
God may forgive it thee
Amen, amen, quoth Earl Marshal
I wish it so may be
Do you see yonder little child
A-tossing of that ball?
That is Earl Marshal son, she said
And I love him the best of all
And do you see yonder little boy
A-catching of that ball?
That is King Henry's son, she said
And I love him the worst of all
His head is like unto a bull
His nose is like a boar
No matter for that, King Henry said
I love him the better therefore
Then the King threw off his friar's coat
He appeared all in red
She shrieked, she cried, she wrung her hands
She said she was betrayed
And the King looked over his left shoulder
And a grim look looked at he
And he said, Earl Marshal, but for my oath
Then hanged you would be