[Intro]
My head hurts, my brain in pain
I sit down on my sofa lookin' into space
Time is goin' slow
But at the same time, it' goin' fast
I just take a couple of pills to ease it cause...
[Hook]
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
[Verse 1]
Today I'm takin' paink**ers
My brain hurts so bad that I need to lie in the dark, I can hear a bark outside gettin' louder so I'mma close my eyes shut
I have a sore bu*t after I sat on a brick
I end up feelin' sick, afterwards I started to puke after I took a book to read to clear my mind, didn't work as much as I thought it would so I started to shook
I feel like I am weakening
I'm wakening to the sound of a hound that is louder than the dog bark but it's more nice to hear and not so sore to my ears and head, a bullet in my mind giving me thoughts of seeing myself dead
I just wondered what will happen to me as I'm lookin' outside when I'm hooked to the sky, lookin' up at it at night cause it's so beautiful at night with all the stars and shootin' stars
I wish I could go up to space and live on the moon for a week to feel the wonderful sense of space, the dark sky colour like the ace of spades cause it's wonderful to be in the dark
Turn off the lights and just look into the sky, take an hour to daydream
Today I seem to feel the hurt in my head
I then hit the floor as I get back up but I feel like there's no more strength left in me
I fall down again and feel the need to take a paink**in' medicine
I start to look back at the times I've had cause I feel like I'm dying and I start to spaz
Fall down so fast and havin' a fit that is so damn strange but yet I think I'm deranged when I look into my own eyes like a serial k**er about to k** ya
I have a sore leg too, I did bang it when I took off my left shoe
Outside it rains and I'm sittin' alone, there's no tickin' from the clock
I feel like my life is about to stop
I take out a couple of pills before wantin' to consume the whole packet
I take out a water bottle I forgot I had in my jacket
I remember back years ago my room window had a crack on it when someone threw the first stone, then the second one smashed it which made me and my dad move out to my aunts house but my cousin out to another country and his brother living with his girlfriend
Back then I had no clue about sh**, but now I do and while I look into the mirror, I can hear a voice in my head sayin' that pain is okay but time to time you have to ease it so you can feel more better
[Hook]
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
[Verse 2]
Life can be good sometimes when I live it
Don't get me wrong it can be sh** too but that's when the bad times and days get through
Stop it from gettin' through by believing in yourself, I do that less
I just feel a pin sometimes through my chest and how the pain is, it's very sore but it's always giving me time to inflict more onto myself, yeah
I might sound crazy when I say this but it's something I would never say when I am pissed, takin' a couple of Buds
The hurt I feel everyday in my life, as I hate it like a knife through my f**in' chest and then I feel like I ain't the best
I start to punch walls, get very dizzy like I took an ecstasy pill til I feel like I wanna k** my brain, put it to the end
I keep askin' a friend to help me but he claims he's always busy
He hurts me like a girl dumpin' me (crying)
What the f** am I gonna do?
I feel like poo but that is just everyday mostly cause I ain't happy all the time
Most of the days I'm sad and depressed to the extend that I find it hard to rhyme
I find it hard to do most things in my life, I start to take breaks after writing and recording but my past just get's the best of me as I feel angry at times when I need help so much that I need to be happy but it doesn't work for me cause I lost a gran and I can't take the fact, face the fact and just want to k** myself so I can be there with her, but I know she's here with me in spirit and I know that she'll be proud of me at times when I'm happy, but that's just sometimes due to the fact I am mostly sad in my life at this moment, I feel like to sleep on the cement, I just feel torment, and I ain't in Hell yet
I bet, my brain is dead but I rest on my bed til I die from paink**er pill overdose
Who knows, I could die from a bleedin' from the nose but what chances will that happen
Rappin' while I'm nappin' and sleep eatin' at the same time my feet's tappin'
I start to crap myself once I wake up from a loud bang next door, a drill around 4
At that time of night it's annoying as I'm tryin' to get to sleep
[Bridge]
When I feel the pain, it's painful for me
The pain feels like it ain't goin' away like a mind scar
What can I do, all I do is lookin' up to a star
Look into a fire burning away so will the pain go today
[Verse 3]
So I feel the pain gettin' worse as I barely think about things
It's makin' me speechless too, that's why my rappin' ain't doing good
I keep myself afloat til I begin to float above as I regret a sin
I begin to feel the pain again and put myself to the end
I phone my friend, he doesn't answer
Is my life gettin' worse or am I gonna get better
[Hook]
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
[Hook]
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er
I'm in so much hurt but I need to get my head straight
I just don't know what to do, so I'mma take a paink**er