[PIRATES]
We're gonna have to k** ya if you sing the freakin' song
It didn't win an Emmy, now it's time to move along
Winter's not just coming
Hell, it came, and then it went
Now it's back with this year's least expected big event!
[KING RICHARD]: You mean?
[PIRATES]
Arrgh!
It's a new season for our hero and pals
A new season and it's gonna be scorchin'
Off on new sprees and new exotic locales
With new guests who'll cost the network a fortune
[KING RICHARD]: I'll go reclaim the castle I'm the rightful ruler of
[GALAVANT]
I'll suffer through the ha**le
Then go save my one true love
[PIRATES]
It's a new season, so we won't be reprisin' that tune
[HORTENSIANS]
Way back in days of old
There was a legend told
Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh Galavant
Noooo!
It's a new season in Hortensia too
[JESTER]: A new season and it's totally b**hin'
[GWYNNE]: We've got new fleas in our new clothing
[CHEF]: It's true!
And new cheese in our new cutting-edge kitchen
[KING OF VALENCIA]: We'll stay here with the princess 'til she weds her little cuz
[QUEEN OF VALENCIA]: Yes, we know it's incest, still, it's what our family does
[HORTENSIANS]: It's a new season
[PRINCE HARRY]: and my Izzy, why she's in her room
[ISABELLA]
I've tried so desperately to win my freedom
Tried, yes, I've tried, dear god, I've tried
Though as a feminist, I don't quite need him
Where is my Galavant?
Come find me, Galavant!
When will our plot lines re-collide?
[MADALENA]: It's a new season for our brand new regime
[GARETH]: A new season here in sunny Valencia
[MADALENA]: With new treason to deliciously scheme
[GARETH]: And new levels of psychotic dementia
[MADALENA]: I'm putting every qualm aside to seize the kingdom's reigns
[GARETH]: I'll commit some homicide and sing a few refrains
[SID]: And this season maybe I'll get to squeeze in some
[VALENCIANS]: So in the weeks to come ignore the pageants that they'll hold
[GARETH]: Skip the football matches
[JESTER]: And the globes made out of gold
[PIRATES]: Screw all those apprentices
[VALENCIANS]: And every bachelorette
Give into the miracle that no one thought we'd get!
[GALAVANT, KING RICHARD, PIRATES]: It's a new season, though it's still not that long
[HORTENSIANS]: A new season with some slightly new shadings
[VALENCIANS]: There's still no reason why we burst into song
[GALAVANT, KING RICHARD, PIRATES]: You'll know hell's freezing if we get decent ratings
[ISABELLA]: Join the royals
[JESTER]: And the jester
[GWYNNE]: And the servant
[CHEF]: And the chef!
[MADALENA]: The queen
[GARETH]: The thug
[GALAVANT]: The hero
[KING RICHARD]: And the hero's B.F.F
[SID]: And the whole entire season ends with armies from Valencia, Hortensia, and Richard's land in one ginormous battle to decide who's gonna be the one true king to rule the whole entire...
[GARETH]: Way to blow it, you prat
[GALAVANT, KING RICHARD, PIRATES]: It's a new season so hang onto your sword
[HORTENSIANS]: A new season which you'll prob'ly record
[VALENCIANS]: A new season so get comfortable please and let's go
[ALL]: Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh!