JASON: Melanie!
MELANIE: Hey Jason!
JASON: What's going on?
MELANIE: Not much. I didn't know you were back in LA
JASON: Yeah, yeah. I had a pretty amazing trip. I mean, it was unreal
MELANIE: Really? I can't wait to hear about it
JASON: No, I have a lot to tell you
MELANIE: What is it?
JASON: C'mon. Do you remember the 90's?
MELANIE: Yeah
JASON: Y'know. People were talking about getting piercings and getting tribal tattoos. And people were singing about saving the planet; forming bands?
MELANIE: Yeah
JASON: There's a place where that idea still exists as a reality and I've been there
MELANIE: Where is it?
JASON: Portland
MELANIE: Oregon?
JASON: Yeah
[Hook]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
The tattoo ink never runs dry
JASON: Remember when people were content to be unambitious? Sleep to eleven? Just hangout with their friends? You'd have no occupations whatsoever. Maybe you work a couple of hours a week at a coffee shop?
MELANIE: Right. I thought that died out a long time ago
JASON: Not in Portland. Portland is a city where young people go to retire
[Hook]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
All the hot girls wear gla**es (Yeah!)
JASON: Remember the 90's when they'd encourage you to be weird? It was just an amazing time where people would go to see something like the Jim Rose sideshow circus and watch someone hang something from their penis? You could grow up to want to be a clown. People went to clown school!
MELANIE: I gave up clowning years ago
JASON: In Portland, you don't have to
[Hook]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
Sleep 'til eleven, you'll be in heaven
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
The Dream is alive
MELANIE: So from what I can surmise from what you're positing, it's like Portland's almost an alternative universe. It's like Gore won. The Bush administration never happened
JASON: Exactly
MELANIE: In Portland it's almost like cars don't exist, right? People ride bikes or double-decker bikes. They ride unicycles. They ride the tram. They ride skateboards!
[Hook]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
My flannel shirt still looks fly
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
JASON: In Portland you can go to a record store and sell your CD's!
[Bridge]
Turn that dirty clown frown right upside down
MELANIE: In Portland you can put a bird on something and just call it art!
[Hook]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland
The Dream of the---
MELANIE: Hey! I made it!
JASON: Yeah, you're a little late
MELANIE: Sorry
JASON: You're also a little San Francisco right now
JASON: Sorry. (proceeds to remove Melanie's various piercings) Much better. Welcome to Portland
MELANIE: Thank you
[Outro]
The Dream of the 90's is alive in Portland