The Lieberman
Who can take your problems, make 'em seem ok?
Who won't work past sundown or at all on Saturday?
The Lieberman (The Lieberman)
The Lieberman can (The Lieberman can)
The Lieberman can 'cause he mixes it with chutzba and a goyomobe?
The taste of his defeat
Wasn't all that sweet
In fact, it tastes a lot like spinach
You know that there are places in which
I couldn't even beat Kucinich
Who lost in 2000, dropped out in '04?
Who wants to write a book and then get big and fat like Gore?
The Lieberman (The Lieberman)
The Lieberman can
I'm So Pretty
See that guy who's second in Iowa
Who can this John Edwards guy be?
Nice than them all
Such a Southern drawl
Here's a guy with flair
And a head of hair
I'm so pretty
Oh so pretty
In each city
I'm drawin' your glance
And I'm skinny
That's from chasin' every ambulance
He's so charming
And disarming
Slightly smarmy
But pretty and nice
It's a pity he won't win
But I'd be nice for vice!
Kerry Baby
So Electable
Modern NATO General
I am the very model of a former NATO general
An anti-war four star commander, and I'm also liberal
I proudly served in Vietnam, I'm tested and I'm battle scared
I'm like that guy who stayed in Texas hiding in the National Guard
I know Herzegovina, and I'll spell it 'cause I'm clever too
I'll bet you that is something that George W could never do
My military knowledge is superior and so astute
Unlike the current president, I own my very own flight suit
(Unlike the current president, he owns his very own flight suit
Unlike the current president, he owns his very own flight suit
Unlike the current president, he also owns his very own flight suit)
I am the perfect candidate as you can see I've got it all
Although I've spoken my position on the issues not at all
In short, in matters economic, national and liberal
I am the very model of positions that are general
Gay Dean Believer
We all love Vermont
It's the one state if we want
To make a civil union, it's ok
Now it seems we've lost a friend
But his campaign had to end
We're on our knees and begging him to stay
Cheer up, Howard Dean
See how much it means
To a gay Dean believer
And a homecoming queen
People loved you more
When you got support from Gore
It helped you with those Southern guys a lot
But those rednecks weren't for you
They didn't love you like we do
Though we think that Southern guys in trucks are hot
Queer up, frumpy Dean
Get an ab machine
And we'll be right behind you
If you know what we mean...
Shout