the last time I saw josh at school his head was shaved
and his skull had been stapled shut
he'd liked this boy
and when the boy found out about it
hed spit on him
and then 8 months later
out of nowhere
he clubbed him with a metal pipe
the drama teacher mr franklin said,
“Remember that forever children
that is what hatred looks like”
but I saw the wound
it didn't look like hatred
it looked like a mouth
a wide open mouth
blood rusted gate
that let the dreadful animals of lust escape
how dare he speak of it out loud
didn't he know what waited just outside the walls
for boys like us
did he forget?
the last time I saw josh at school his head was shaved
and his skull was stapled shut
he'd liked this boy
and when the boy found out about it
hed spit on him
and shouldered him against the wall of lockers
the boy whose name was Thomas rivers
was convicted of two counts of felony malicious wounding
but he skipped the murder rap with something that they call the gay panic defense
in his panic
he left a teenage boy for dead
Remember that forever children
that is what hatred looks like
but I saw the wound
it didn't look like hatred
it looked like a mouth
with tarnished metal sutures for its teeth
A white and puckered scalp for lips
A loud and punch drunk mouth
that sang in languages of dumb struck fog and held its smile for my eyes
Unbearable, a jagged riverbed
the last time I saw josh at school his head was shaved
and his skull was stapled shut
he'd liked this boy
and when the boy found out about it
it was from somebody that josh trusted
some girl
whose razor wired name is lost to us
who probably thought itd be funny
“funny
to hear about it
josh the gay kid thinks your cute
He likes you, he told me”
Jealous girl, a blistering of ants
A swarm of angry red
Remember that forever children
that is what hatred looks like
but I saw the wound
it didn't look like hatred
it looked like a mouth
The mouth that I kissed instead of davids mouth
instead of tim or adams mouth
the mouth that swallowed risk and flirt and take and have
and spouted blooms of dreadful silence
we men who love mens bodies know this mouth
its whispered menace
its venom spit
its fevered breath
the last time I saw josh at school his head was shaved
and his skull was stapled shut
he'd liked this boy
the boy found out about it
and I remembered that forever
what it looked like
hatred
like a mouth