God bless my soul what can I do they say my salt beef dinner is a k**er It's got carcinogens and heavy duty fats it could serve as an elephant filler. I'm as good as dead but I'm sure well fed 'cause I love those buckets of riblets I love to drink that liquor and chew those bones even though I'm picking my giblets Put on the beef, peas pudding and the greens Carrots and turnips, can't you smell that steam Some new potatoes with a puddin' good and lumpy No I just can't wait, I'm a salt beef junkie. Now some folks like to eat carrot sticks 'cause they're afraid they might become gluttons, But me I don't like those rabbit foods 'cause I'm afraid that I might pa** bu*tons Every Sunday morning while some folks fast or eat food that tastes real crappy
I got my salt beef dinner cooking on the stove 'cause I wanna die real happy. Jane Fonda likes to eat sesame seeds and Twiggy likes low fat tofu But they don't live in Newfoundland where the winter winds blow right through you Now if they lived in Wesleyville where the north wind blows right vicious They'd enjoy their salt beef dinners just like me and the missus I don't want to be some health food freak who eats alfalfa and bean sprouts I don't want to live to a hundred and three if I got to throw my beef out When it comes right down to preparing food I don't want to germinate or shuck it I'll take my chances on salt beef dinners and keep my head in this bucket.