"Mrs McGraw," the seargent said "would you like a soldier Of your son, Ted? With a scarlet coat and a big co*ked hat Mrs Mcgraw wouldn't you like that? " With me too-rye-ay Foddle-diddle-day With me toorye oorye oorye-ay With me toorye-ay Foddle diddle day Me toorye oorye oorye-ay Mrs Mcgraw lived on the shore And after seven years or more She spied a ship come into the bay With her son from far away Oh Captain dear where have you been You been sailing the mediterranean Have you news of my son Ted Is he living or is he dead? With me too-rye-ay Foddle-diddle-day With me toorye oorye oorye-ay With me toorye-ay Foddle diddle day Me toorye oorye oorye-ay Up came Ted without any legs And in their place two wooden pegs She kissed him a dozen times or two And said my God Ted is it you? Now were you drunk or were you blind When you left your two fine legs behind? Or was it walking upon the sea
That wore your two fine legs away? With me too-rye-ay Foddle-diddle-day With me toorye oorye oorye-ay With me toorye-ay Foddle diddle day Me toorye oorye oorye-ay Now I wasn't drunk and I wasn't blind When I left my two fine legs behind A cannon ball on the fifth of May Tore my two fine legs away Oh Teddy boy they will all cry Your two fine legs were your mother's pride Stumps made of tree won't do at all Why didn't you run from the cannonball? With me too-rye-ay Foddle-diddle-day With me toorye oorye oorye-ay With me toorye-ay Foddle diddle day Me toorye oorye oorye-ay All foreign wars, I do proclaim There only blood and a mother's pain And I'd rather have my son as he used to be Then the King of America and his whole Navy With me too-rye-ay Foddle-diddle-day With me toorye oorye oorye-ay With me toorye-ay Foddle diddle day Me toorye oorye oorye-ay